A Cold wind in Hell
by daliaflower
Summary: Post Partings, written as actual episodes of the show. This will be what I see as the start of Season 7. Definitely LL, but it will take them a while to get themselves together. I've got a couple of episodes planned out already. Please review!
1. Silk and Spongebob

Rory in her PJ's in her bed. A leather jacket is on the bed next to her. She strokes it idly while she sighs into her cell phone. "I know you've only been in London for a couple of hours, but I can't help that I miss you. Don't you miss me?"

"Of course I miss you, Ace." Logan is leaning back in a flowery-upholstered arm chair with his feet up on a nearby table in what is obviously a fancy hotel room. He's on his cell. "But I don't want you to be miserable without me. That'd be an awful way to spend a year."

"Would you rather I didn't miss you, then?"

"Well, no. I'd rather-"

"Because you know, I am a rather fetching young lady. I could go out right now and find myself a reason not to miss you."

"No, you couldn't," Logan says very matter-of-factly.

"What! I'm insul-"

"**You** are still in your pajamas. And as much as I love you, you're not going to win any beauty contests that way."

A short pause from Rory. "And you don't think I could pick up someone in my pajamas? Is that it?"

"Well it depends. Silky and black – in a heartbeat. Cotton and Spongebob – I would have to seriously question your likelihood of success."

Rory humfs in mock anger and pulls the sheet up to hide the large SpongeBob on her chest.

"Well, which is it, Ace?"

"Since you know me so well, you tell me."

"Ah, a challenge. Well, in my head, you're definitely wearing the silky black with the red lace. But in reality I would have to go with-" Rory's phone beeps and interrupts Logan. Rory looks at the display quickly, pushes a button and goes back to her conversation.

"Who was that?" Logan asks.

"Just my mom."

"Well then, where were we?"

"You were telling me how beautiful I look first thing in the morning."

"Was I? That doesn't sound terribly like me. _I_ think I was talking about you in black silk."

"A particularly uncouth conversation topic for a young gentleman."

"Now who ever said that I was a gentleman?"

"An excellent point. I guess that is why you were shipped off to London, after all. To whip you into shape." Rory's phone beeps again.

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Lorelai is perched on the edge of an armchair in a Starbucks. She is wearing the same turquoise dress as the night before. Her hair looks barely brushed, her face is tearstained. She is bouncing her legs up and down nervously as she listens to the ringing in her cell phone. Voicemail picks up and Rory's voice can be heard, "This is Rory's cell phone, and she didn't answer." Lorelai slams her phone shut, groans in aggravation and begins dialing again.

It rings. Lorelai whispers, "Come on, Rory." Her legs continue to twitch.

"Yes, mother?" Rory sounds annoyed through the phone.

Lorelai exhales deeply, "Oh, thank God."

"I was talking to Logan in London, Mom. If you leave a message, I would have called you right back. You didn't have to call 5 times in a row-"

"I need you." Lorelai interrupts her daughter.

"What do you mean, you need me?" The anger starts to leave Rory's voice.

"I'm in Middletown."

Rory sits up a little in bed. "What do you mean, you're in Middletown?"

"I'm in Middletown and I need you. Am I not speaking English?"

"Is everything OK? Are you OK? Why are you in Middletown?"

"I stopped here. On my way home."

"On your way home from what? From where?" Rory asks, suddenly deeply interested in the answers.

"Boston." Lorelai answers quiety.

"What? Boston? Why were you in Boston? And why stop in Middletown, you're only about-"

"Rory, please." Lorelai is practically begging. Rory finally hears the strain in her mothers voice.

"You saw Dad." Rory guesses. Lorelai closes her eyes and nods her head silently. "Mom? Mom? Is Dad OK?"

Lorelai swallows and with some difficulty manages to speak steadily. "He's fine."

"Gigi?"

"Gigi's fine. Everyone's fine. No one's hurt." Lorelai blurts out quickly.

"Then what's wrong?"

"Rory. I need you here." Lorelai sounds desperate.

"Ok, I'll be there in one hour. Where in Middletown are you?"

"Now," Lorelai whispers harshly into the phone.

"What? Mom, I'll be there soon."

"Not soon, Rory. Now. This is not a time for soon. This is the time for now. This is when you go into the secret lab at Yale, you know, the one with the teleporters, not the one with the talking rats, and you get here now. This is the time when you take whatever money Logan put in the freezer when he left and buy a plane and get here now. This is the time for "Beam me up, Scottie." Not soon. Now." She's beyond babbling at this point.

Rory finally looks worried, and hurriedly gets up out of bed. She trips on something as she does, and falls back down.

"Rory?" Her mother asks.

"I'm fine, I'm coming. I'm at the teleporter lab now. Where in Middletown are you?"

"Starbucks," Says Lorelai forlornly.

Rory freezes in the middle of brushing her hair. "What? Why are you in Starbucks? You hate Starbucks."

"Yes, but, but, a bad thing happened," she stammers. Shakes her head as if to clear it. "I did a bad thing, kid. I did a very bad thing."

"Mom, I'm sure it's not that bad. And I'll be there as soon as I can figure out how to work this damn machine." Rory is buttoning her jeans, squeezing her feet into the nearest shoes. "How many cups of coffee have you had, Mom?"

"None," she sniffles.

"Have one. That's what Starbucks is for, after all. Overpriced coffee."

"I don't deserve coffee. I don't deserve…" she breaks off into sniffles. Rory is grabbing things and shoving them into a purse. "I yelled and screamed and cried, and he yelled..."

"Who? Dad?" No answer. "Luke?"

"And I left and…and he just stood there. And I did a horrible, horrible thing. And I don't deserve coffee ever, ever again."

"You and Luke had a fight?"

Lorelai nods and grunts her agreement.

"And then you did a bad thing?" Another grunt. "In Middletown?" No response. "In Boston?" Grunt. Understanding starts to spread over Rory's face. "You did a bad thing in Boston?" Grunt. "And you're sure it was in Boston?"

"Oh, very sure…" she's trying to hold back tears.

"On my way." Rory says into the phone as she locks the apartment door and slams her phone shut. "Oh, crap!" She screams angrily to the empty hallway as she kicks the elevator door and then begins to run down the stairs, limping.

(Roll intro)


	2. The Great Cheeseburger Tasting

**Notes:** This is just my idea if what could/should happen after the disastrous events on the season 6 finale. I am trying to be as realistic as I can to the show; that means that the characters will not do anything that I couldn't see them really doing on the show (hopefully), that there will be multiple scenes that are in here just for fluff and humor, and the story will be broken up by commercials. And while ultimately this story is completely LL, my plot will most likely be as slow and tortuous as anything they would dream up on GG. (Maybe not quite that bad.) The first epsiode has been completed, and I've got two more planned out. Review (I appreciate honest reviews of both content and style) and feel free to enjoy my version of season 7 until the real one starts up.

I own very little in this universe. None of those items are elements of a WB/CW show.

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Jingle jingle

The door to Starbucks opens and Rory storms in. "Thank God," she says loudly as she spots her mother. "Do you know that this is the 4th Starbucks I've tried this morning? This place really is spawning like satan."

Everyone in the shop turns to look at her outburst. One of the barristas behind the counter pumps his fist in the air and loudly responds, "Right on sista!" Rory wrinkles her brow at the guy and then sits down on an arm chair across from her mother. Lorelai is calmer now, sitting in a big pleather arm chair, leaning forward staring into a full coffee cup on the low table between her and Rory.

"Hi Mom." Rory ventures shyly to her mother.

Lorelai looks up at her daughter's voice. "Hey, kid," she says cocking her head to one side and giving Rory a wavering smile. "Sorry it's so early."

Relieved that her mom seems to be functioning again, Rory smiles back and agrees, "Seriously. You have to learn to have emergencies at more convenient times." Stifling a yawn she reaches across the table, picks up the coffee cup and takes a sip. Barely managing to keep the coffee in her mouth she grimaces, "This is freezing."

"Probably," Lorelai says in a dead tone. "I don't deserve coffee." Rory tries to interrupt her, but Lorelai continues in the same strangely unemotional voice. "You told me to buy some, so I did, and I looked at it, just in case maybe I could absorb caffeine by osmosis, but unfortunately my skin, like my skull, is very thick. Just one more reason why I don't deserve coffee…"

"Mom. Of course you deserve coffee. Everyone deserves coffee. It is a basic human right. Especially at this time in the morning."

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Back in the Starbucks, it is obviously some time later. Rory and Lorelai are now sharing the large pleather armchair and hopefully a fresh cup of coffee. Pieces of a muffin are littered on the adjacent table. Both Gilmores are somewhat disheveled and red-eyed, neither having ever gotten themselves properly sheveled to begin with that morning. Lorelai has related most of her story at this point, and it has obviously been hard for her. It's been hard for Rory to hear, as well.

"And, well," she looks at her mother's face to make sure she's able to handle the question before continuing. "What did Dad have to say?"

"Chris was...great." Lorelai begins slowly.

Rory makes a face and says jokingly, "Dirty!"

"That's not what I meant at all. He was so understanding, about everything."

Rory smiled encouragingly, thankful that _someone_ had treated her mother well in the past 24-hours.

"When I woke up this morning, I was just lying in that bed, not even trying to figure out what to do next. I couldn't even imagine that the world was going to go on after something so catastrophic. I mean, there wasn't supposed to be a tomorrow. That was supposed to be it. Luke said no, close curtain. The end. Finito. And I was just lying there, wallowing-"

"Wallowing can be good sometimes," Rory chimed in helpfully.

A brief, forced smile appeared on Lorelai's face as she nodded and continued. "I was just lying there wallowing and he hands me a glass of water and two aspirin and tells me not to worry. He tells me that he gets it. That he won't pretend that this wasn't something that he wanted, but he understands that it's not what I wanted. That I love Luke. He knows that. Chris knows that. Which just makes me feel worse. Because he knows it, but I, I obviously don't know it well enough not to sleep with _him_." As she continues relating that mornings events, Lorelai starts talking faster and faster. "So he says that he knows that I love Luke and that when I came to him I was very upset. And then later that I was very upset _and _very drunk. And that if he hadn't been quite so eager and drunk himself, he wouldn't have taken advantage of the situation like that. He apologized. To me. I used him, and he apologized. I don't deserve an apology. I don't even deserve coffee…" she repeats the phrase again.

"So what does he want to do?" Rory asked, trying to draw her mother out of her spiral.

"He said he'd be happy with anything. He'd be there for me as long as I wanted him. But that he would be happy with just, with just last night." Rory looked at her in disbelief. Lorelai nodded in amazed agreement with her daughter before continuing. "He said he was sorry that things never seemed to work out for the two of us, and he knew that it was usually his fault. And then he tells me that it never had to be brought up again. That when he needed to leave me and make things work with Sherry, I was so great and understanding and I never told her anything, and that now he would be willing to return the favor."

"And not tell Luke?"

"And not tell anyone. He said it could be just like it had never happened. And then he apologized again. I know what it's like to be in love, he says, and a single mistake really shouldn't get in the way of that."

"Not tell anyone? Like really not tell anyone? Not grandma and grandpa? Not drunkenly blurt it out at the next family function? Not stand up at your wedding when the minister asks if there are any objections?" Rory asked, imagining all of the ways her father could screw this up.

"He said it would be just like it never happened." Lorelai looked at Rory, as both of them consider what Chris's impact could be on both of their lives. After a pause Lorelai smiles ruefully and says, "But I did a real bad thing, kid."

Rory is mulling over the whole situation. She can't believe that her father would let something like this go, but it all seems too good to be true. "Yeah. But Luke never has to know about it." Rory looks truly hopeful.

Lorelai looks up from her hands, which she had been wringing constantly since starting her story. Her face looks relieved for a moment, and then quickly fades to confusion. "Yeah, I guess that's true."

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Luke's diner during the daytime. There are some people at tables and one at the counter, but not much is going on. Lane is working the tables and Luke is behind the counter. He's going over some paperwork somewhat distractedly, flipping through receipts, punching numbers into a calculator, and then going back and re-entering the numbers again. Every few moments, as somebody walks by outside, his head whips up to see who it is.

Kirk is at one of the tables, and spread out around him are 10 plates with cheeseburgers on them. Each looks slightly different and each has a bite or two taken out of it. As Cesar rings the bell, Lane brings Kirk yet another cheeseburger. She sets it on the table in front of him and starts to walk away, then changes her mind and decides to stay and watch. Kirk inspects the burger very closely, and turns the plate around in order to get the full effect. He sets the plate at a very specific angle, whips out a camera and snaps a picture.

"Kirk!" Lane says somewhat irritably, "_What_ are you doing?"

"Shhh!" Kirk hisses, as he spins the burger again. "You'll ruin my concentration!" He snaps another photo and jots down a note on a small tablet of paper.

"Kirk…" Lane asks again.

"I am sampling cheeseburgers."

"Yes. But _why_ are you sampling cheeseburgers, Kirk?"

"Because of you," Kirk says in typical Kirk-monotone.

"Because of me?"

"Yes." He begins smelling his most recent cheeseburger acquisition.

Lane throws her hands up and turns to walk back to the counter. She changes her mind again and turns back to Kirk. "How did I cause you to sample a dozen different cheeseburgers, Kirk?"

Sniff sniff. "You got married." He quickly licks the burger's bun

"Yeah." Lane smiles at the memory and almost subconsciously starts to play with the ring on her finger before she snaps out of her reverie. "But how did my wedding create a sudden need for a cheeseburger tasting?"

Kirk sighs and stops sniffing at the cheeseburger. Looking accusing at Lane he says, "Ever since your wedding, all Lulu can talk about is marriage. Wouldn't it be nice if we got to see each other more often, Kirk? Look at those beautiful flowers, Kirk. Did you know that wolves mate for life, Kirk? You're pulling my hair, Kirk. She just won't stop."

"Uh huh. And you're going to pacify her with the perfect cheeseburger?" Lane guesses.

"No." Kirk responds irritably. "I'm going to ask her to marry me. But I have to make sure that everything is perfect when I do."

"And you're going to propose here?"

"Of course. Lulu loves cheeseburgers. And this is where we had our first date. And besides, you just can't beat Luke's for romantic ambiance."

The door jingles as it opens. Luke's head jerks up from his receipts, eyes wide and expectant. When Zach walks in his face falls and he goes back to his work. Zach smiles and rushes up behind Lane and gives her a hug. "Hello, wife." He says quietly to her.

"Hello, husband," she answers back with a smile.

Kirk shakes his head slowly. "Yup. There's a great romantic atmosphere in this place."

Zach looks up as if just seeing Kirk there for the first time. "Huh?"

"You and Lane. Luke and Lorelai." Kirk explains as Luke's head jerks up at his name. He keeps his head up this time listening to the conversation. "Very romantic stories. All centered around this place. You both got engaged here, too. Why can't I?" Kirk says, only a little angry.

"Well, I never meant that…" Lane starts.

She is interrupted by a rather annoyed Luke coming out from behind the counter. "What's going on here?"

"Oh!" Lane says, surprised to see him there. "It's the great cheeseburger tasting of 2006."

"Uh huh." Luke says looking out the door. Seeing nothing, he glares. Zach thinks he's glaring at him and jumps back a little so that he's not leaning on Lane anymore.

"I need an engagement-burger, Luke." Kirk says without noticing anything. "You're engaged, give me some inspiration."

Angrily, Luke snaps, "There is no such thing as an engagement-burger, Kirk." He looks at Lane and Zach. "And you're just here to distract Lane, I assume?"

"Uhhhh, no." He stutters and walks back towards a table. "Lunch. I'm here for lunch." He sits down with a thud, not taking his eyes off Luke.

"Uh huh." Luke nods sarcastically. Zach quickly picks up a menu and hides behind it.

Lane comes over with her pad and paper poised to write down his order in an attempt to look busy. "What'll it be?" she asks in a very good impression of a New York City diner waitress.

Luke smirks and walks over to the door. He peers out the window. Seeing nothing of interest, he opens the door and walks outside a few steps. He looks up and down the street and again seeing nothing, he comes back into the diner. After a quick glance at Kirk he does a double take. "That's a lot of burgers there, Kirk."

"And none of them are worthy of my lady love." Kirk responds to no one as Luke walks up the stairs towards his apartment.

As soon as Luke leaves, Lane bends down and kisses Zach quickly. Kirk sighs and goes back to his burger, actually taking a bite this time. When Lane straightens up, Zach says, "Rueben on rye, fries and a cherry coke."

"I don't have cherry coke, Zach, I only have regular Coke." Lane explains as the door jingles as Babette and Morey walk in. "Have a seat anywhere, I'll be over in a minute."

"Thanks, sugar." Babette says.

"How come you don't have cherry coke? The diners on TV always have cherry cokes." Zach asks.

"The diners on TV are all from the 1950's. They may have had cherry coke, but they didn't have chili cheese fries." Lane answers knowledgeably.

"Hmm. And I do like chili cheese fries," Zach muses. "A regular coke, then."

"Excellent." Lane scribbles on her pad and goes back to give the order to Cesar. She brings Zach his soda while Luke comes down the stairs. She then starts to go over to take Babette and Morey's orders.

Luke angrily throws something wrapped in a napkin into the garbage can behind the counter and yells, "Cesar. I said halfway between rare and medium rare! Make me another one, and get it right this time. I don't want to have to throw out another burger!" Luke turns and sees Babette at the table and hurries over, not even noticing Lane.

"Babette! Morey! How are you two doing?" He exclaims as he jostles Lane out of the way. She looks confused, as she was already writing down their order.

"Oh! We're doing fine, aren't we Morey?" Babette looks startled at the attention.

"Yes, dear." Morey dutifully answers.

"What's new? How are things?" His enthusiasm is very un-Luke like.

"Things? Uhh…things are good. I was just telling Lane here how Morey likes his hash-browns cooked."

Lane struggles back over to the table to finish the order, but Luke takes her pad of paper and turns her around. "I'll take care of this one, Lane." He says. "You're a newly-wed, you should be spending time with your husband." He pushes her lightly toward Zach who looks up, decides it's safe and waves shyly. Lane walks over towards him looking utterly confused.

"You feeling alright, hun?" Babette asks Luke.

"Me? I'm fine. Great. How are you?" Babette looks confused at the repeated question. "How's the house?"

"The house? The house is fine. Everything is fine. Morey just had a craving for some pancakes and hash browns for lunch today and…"

"Have you seen, uh, Lorelai around?" Luke interrupts.

"What?" Babette is confused by the change in direction. "Lorelai? No. I haven't seen her today. But she's been staying with you for the past couple of days, hasn't she? I haven't seen her or Paul Anka around for a since at least Saturday."

"Yeah, right. I was just looking for her this morning." Luke trails off and wanders back towards the counter.

"Hey! What about Morey's hash browns?"

"I do want some has browns," Morey chimes in while staring out the window.

"Lane!" Luke calls. She jumps over from Zach's table to finish taking Babette's order. Luke goes back to his paperwork behind the counter.

Lane gives the order to Cesar and then comes over to stand next to Luke. Cautiously she asks him, "Hey, Luke. You feeling alright?"

"What? Oh, yeah. I'm just tired. I didn't get much sleep last night." Someone walks into Taylor's Ice Cream Shoppe distracting Luke from his conversation as he stares through the picture window at the brown-haired customer.

"Oh. OK." She doesn't believe him, but she walks away anyway, leaving Luke to his reciepts.

From the table, Kirk sighs loudly as he holds up two burgers in comparison. He puts them down on their plates. "They're all just so uninspired."

"Try some sautéed mushrooms, Kirk." Luke says without looking up from his calculator.

"That's brilliant, Luke! Mushrooms scream romance." Kirk motions for Lane.

"That or "I have fungus"." Zach says from his table.

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"These really are nice digs." Lorelai says cheerfully as she looks around Rory and Logan's apartment. "I don't know how I feel about my daughter living in a nicer place than me."

"You're parents do it, why shouldn't I?" Rory joked, looking up from her laptop long enough to see that her mother had pulled herself together nicely. The cursed turquoise dress had been disposed of (Rory had hidden in it a box her closet…just in case) and Lorelai was wearing jeans and a Me First and the Gimme Gimmes t-shirt that was just a touch too small. Her hair was brushed, her face was clean and the last traces of tearful eyes had almost disappeared. "_I_ don't know how _I_ feel about the fact that my mother looks better in my clothes than I do." Rory laughed.

Lorelai smiles, strikes a pose and says, "Get used to it," before heading over towards the kitchen. She steals glances at Rory as she walks, trying to see what she's doing. When she's sure that Rory is looking at her laptop screen Lorelai quickly opens a cupboard door and snatches out a mug. She checks to make sure Rory didn't see her, and then slowly sidles her way over towards the coffee pot. Without taking her eyes off of Rory, she picks up the pot and ever-so-slowly and starts to pour herself a cup. But nothing comes out. "It's empty!" she whines before she can stop herself.

Rory doesn't even glance up from her computer screen. "What's empty?" she asks calmly.

Caught, Lorelai says miserably, "The coffeepot."

Again, without moving her eyes from what she's reading, Rory picks up her own mug and takes a big sip. "Oh really," she says innocently, "Is it?"

"Ha!" (I do not know how to spell that high-pitched, injured intake of breath that Lorelai makes so often. But that's what I mean.) Lorelai humphs, injured by her daughter's callousness. Then her eyes narrow suspiciously. "Et tu, Rory?"

"I only made one cup," Rory takes another sip without looking at her mother.

"But why?" Lorelai is still feigning injury.

"I thought that you wouldn't drink any." Rory looks up now and raises her eyebrows pointedly. "I thought that you don't _deserve_ coffee." The word was dripping with sarcasm. "Or at least that's what you've been telling me non-stop for three days." She shrugs, looks back down to her screen and takes another sip.

"You knew!" Lorelai shrieks accusingly. "You knew that I've been sneaking coffee the whole time I've been here!"

"You've been doing what?" Rory says with mock horror.

"Oh, you knew!" Lorelai circles the counter in the kitchen and begins walking towards Rory as she rants. "Of course you knew. I'm not that sneaky. I can't lie. I'm horrible at it. You've been watching me! And laughing to yourself! And planning this moment. This horrible coffee-less moment. Oh cruel world, to curse me with such an evil daughter." Lorelai finishes dramatically in a pretended swoon, one arm covering her forehead.

"You-don't-deserve-coffee." Rory says between sips of her own.

"Of course I do. Everyone deserves coffee! It's a basic human right!" Lorelai explodes.

"Aha!" Rory exclaims.

"Aha what? I need coffee!" She pauses in her tirade and come up right next to Rory's desk. Calmly, and somehow diabolical at the same time, she says, "Give me yours."

"What?"

"Please," Lorelai says in a small, high-pitched voice.

Rory goes to take a sip and tips the mug all the way back. "All gone." She says with a devilish smile, handing the now empty mug to her mother. She gets up and walks into the kitchen.

"Evil daughter. Make more." Lorelai half-growls as she takes the mug and glares at Rory as she walks, following her daughter with her eyes. Rory picks up the can of coffee grounds and throws it into the trash can, "All gone."

"Evil, evil daughter to take so much pleasure in your mother's pain."

"Only her self-inflicted pain."

A moment of huffy silence where Lorelai crosses her arms across her chest and stares blankly at Rory's computer. "Let's go get some. I know this great little coffee cart near the library on campus." She's suddenly cheerful at the prospect.

Rory pretends to ponder her mother's request. "You want coffee?" Lorelai nods eagerly like a puppy dog. "On one condition." Lorelai raises an eyebrow quizzically. "I _never_ again want to hear that you don't deserve coffee. I don't even want to hear that phrase again. The bit dies now. Understood?"

"But I-" Lorelai stammers.

"Never again. Or no coffee for you."

The eyes narrow again, her head tilts in consideration. "But I like that bit."

"And I do not. It's an awful, boring repetitive one-line bit. And as your only source of coffee, and current landlord, I might add, I believe it is time for it to go the way of the near-sighted cannibal bit."

"I had almost forgotten about the near-sighted cannibal," Lorelai smiles at the memory.

"As well it should be. Coffee, dear mother?" Rory has walked across the apartment again and is now standing over by the apartment door, tempting Lorelai. Lorelai looks as if she is concentrating really hard. "Oh come on!" Rory sighs in exasperation. "This isn't Sophie's Choice. A bad bit or caffeine?"

Reluctantly Lorelai looks up, having found no way around the agreement. "Deal." She says quickly and then looks up expectantly at her daughter as if expecting coffee to magically appear at the word. Finding none, she runs toward the door, grabs Rory's arm and giggles, "Well, come on then." The two sort of run, sort of stumble, sort of twirl out of the apartment door all tangled up in each others arms. They manage to hit the down button on the elevator and then straighten themselves out to look presentable should anyone happen to be in the elevator. They stand still and wait quietly. After a minute, Lorelai puts her arm around Rory's shoulders and quietly and sincerely says, "Thanks for letting me stay kid. I needed a little break."

Rory smiles, puts her arm around her mother's waist and squeezes ever so slightly.

(commercial break)

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There is more. I promise. Reviews make me smile.


	3. Devil in the Dragonfly

Thanks for reading and thanks for reviewing. Please continue to enjoy my version of season 7 until the real one starts. And I promise, stuff does start _happening_ soon...

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Lorelai is in her jeep. That singing music is playing in the background _(you_ know "La la, la la, etc...) She stops the car and puts it in park. Quickly checking her face in the mirror on the back of the sun visor, she grabs her purse and gets out of the car. She shuts the door, turns around and walks resolutely towards the Dragonfly Inn. As she walks up the path, a gardener on his knees in the dirt stops work to look at her. Blatantly scared, the man runs up the stairs and into the inn. Confused, Lorelai looks behind her and checks for something scary. Seeing nothing, she continues up the stairs.

She enters through the front door that the gardener had left open in his hurry. She waves at Michel who is standing at his desk. The singing music fades away. Somewhat surprised and overly happy, Michel smiles at Lorelai as she walks over to him. "Hallo," he is using his fakest, high-pitched cheerful voice that he saves only for the most annoying guests…and Taylor. "How was your trip?"

"It's good to see you too, Michel." Lorelai starts looking around the inn to make sure everything has survived her absence. A maid practically drops her armload of towels when she sees Lorelai in the reception area, and hurries up the stairs towards the guest rooms, almost hitting a waiter coming down with an empty tray as she goes. The waiter looks terrified, rattles the empty dishes on his tray and hightails it out of the main hallway in pure fright. "What is going on here?" A confused and concerned Lorelai asks Michel.

"Here?" Michel, still very high-pitched, plays innocent. "We are running an inn. A very full, very busy inn."

Lorelai gives him an interrogating glance. Michel smiles and gives nothing away. "Fine. Is Sookie here?"

"Sookie? Why, yes, of course. We are very busy." Michel answers, too-sweetly.

Lorelai waits for him to disclose her friends' location. When he offers up no more additional information, she is forced to ask, "Where exactly is she?"

Looking mildly startled that Lorelai doesn't know the answer to this herself, Michel looks up at her and responds, "Well, Sookie is a chef, yes?" Lorelai nods impatiently. "And so, I would guess that she, being a good, hardworking chef would be preparing to feed the guests of her very full, very busy inn. Would you not agree?"

"Yes. Michel?" Lorelai doesn't seem to be in the mood for Michel's antics this morning.

"I would guess, and it would only be a guess since I have not been able to leave my desk in quite some time – we are very busy here today – that she is in the kitchen."

"Thank you!" Lorelai exclaims, exasperatedly. "Why did that have to be so difficult?"

"Difficult? I was not trying to be difficult. It is only that we are very busy here today and-"

"Ok. I get it." Lorelai interrupts him. "We're busy, Michel. Then you should get back to work and stop wasting time talking to me!"

"Well, yes, I should," Michel grumbles in his sweetest voice. He turns back to the computer and says, as if no one were around to hear him, "Why, it must be nice to be able to take a vacation whenever you like."

She gives Michel a very sarcastic smile and glibly says, "Just one of the perks of being the boss." Michel looks up at her, horrified at her insensitivity. "But," Lorelai adds kindly, "If it makes you feel any better, it wasn't much fun."

"Yes, it does a leettle." He says, still smiling sweetly.

Lorelai turns away with a shake of her head and begins to walk towards the kitchen. After a few steps she comes up with a retort and turns back to Michel, who is already on the phone, waiting impatiently for someone on the other end to pick up. He smiles suspiciously when he sees Lorelai looking at him. Shrugging, she continues towards the kitchen, scaring the gardener on his return to work and two more waiters as she goes.

As she enters the kitchen, Sookie is yelling into the phone, "What? Michel? I can't understand…" One of her sous chefs taps her on the shoulder as he sneaks out the back door. Sookie turns, see Lorelai enter and says, "Oh." And hangs up very quickly. Everyone else in the kitchen melts away, heading out to the dining room or escaping out of the back door. Lorelai looks extremely confused now.

"You're back!" Sookie exclaims giving Lorelai a big hug. "How are you? Everything OK?"

Lorelai hugs Sookie back somewhat less enthusiastically and answers with a non-committal, "More or less," as she looks around the kitchen for the source of her employees' fright. "Sweetie, I could have sworn I left my tail and horns at home today. What's going on?"

Sookie laughs nervously, "What do you mean?"

"Why is the whole staff running from me like I've just thrown up split pea soup?"

"They're not." Another nervous laugh. "But that's funny!" She swats Lorelai playfully with a dish towel. "Really funny."

"Uh huh. I've never seen a room empty as fast as this kitchen just did."

Sookie looks around, surprised at the empty kitchen. "Well, maybe they thought that we might want some time to talk after your…vacation." Sookie whispers the last word to emphasize that she knows it's a lie.

"Well, I guess it might be good to talk to someone…" Lorelai trails off as she pours herself a cup of coffee. She just wasn't sure how much she wanted to tell Sookie, at least not yet. Lorelai inhales deeply preparing herself to tell her story. It had taken her two days with Rory before she had stopped crying constantly, and another day until she no longer broke out into tears at random points throughout the day. Most of her hesitation in telling Sookie was fear that she would start crying uncontrollably again. She was finally feeling back in control, and she desperately needed to hold on to that.

As Lorelai lets out her breath slowly and opens her eyes, Sookie exclaims, "Lorelai! I need to tell you something."

Worry and relief flash across Lorelai's face as she says, "Ok, sure. Sookie? What's wrong?"

"Ummm, well. Would you like a scone?" She is clearly nervous.

"Nope, I'm fine."

"Well, OK. Then. Are you sure?"

"Sookie?" Lorelai prods her friend onward.

Sookie takes a deep breath and dives right in. "I went over to your house, when Rory called, just like she asked. But…well. Now, I know it's not your fault, but it's not my fault either. Ok? Nobody did this so don't be upset, please?" Sookie rambles in a barely coherent way, oddly reminiscent of Lorelai.

Shaking her head in an attempt to clear out her ears Lorelai asks, "What?"

"Paul Anka," Sookie starts and stops when she sees Lorelai's face. Shaking her head, she finishes, "Paul Anka ran away."

"He what?" Lorelai sounds crushed and once again on the verge of tears.

"I went over there to take care of him, just like Rory asked, but he wasn't there. But the back door was open a little bit, and well, Jackson and I went out looking for him, but we couldn't find him. And I'm so sorry, honey."

"But how did he get out? He's afraid of the stairs! And the moon! And those little puffy clouds!" Lorelai is upset, but Sookie looks so much worse, like she thinks Lorelai is going to blame her for Paul Anka's disappearance. Lorelai sighs deeply again and then puts her best effort into saying lightly, "Well, I guess everyone was right…I shouldn't have pets." She flashes a sad smile at Sookie.

"Oh, I wish you had asked Luke to take care of Paul Anka instead of me! I feel so bad. I'm sorry." Sookie ventures.

"Oh, sweetie," Lorelai smiles genuinely this time while she tries to keep herself from crying, "It's not your fault! It's completely not your fault. You were just trying to help. And if I was a decent human being, I'd have come back to take care of him myself."

A relieved Sookie gives Lorelai a big hug and tries to comfort her. "You're not mad?" Lorelai shakes her head vigorously. "Maybe he'll be happy in the wild? There are no stairs in the wild."

"Maybe." Lorelai laughs. "He's probably been crowned the canine King of Connecticut by now." She sniffles, but smiles bravely for Sookie. She could always get another dog…

"You going to be OK?" Sookie asks. Lorelai nods mutely. The phone rings and Sookie answers it as she pats Lorelai on the shoulder. "Michel? Yes, I told her. Ummm, fairly well, I suppose." She puts her hand over the phone so that Michel can't hear her. "He sounds so happy!" Sookie whispers. "Do I think you should send everyone back in?" Sookie repeats Michel's question to Lorelai who shakes her head vehemently. "No, I think she might start yelling soon." Lorelai excitedly picks up a pot and bangs it on the counter, happy to help with the charade. "And apparently she might start throwing my very expensive pots from France, too," Sookie shoots a glare at Lorelai who drops the pot and smiles sheepishly. "No, Michel. You cannot come and watch!" Sookie says indignantly into the phone and then hangs up, smiling.

She looks at Lorelai expectantly, waiting for a joke at Michel's expense. But Lorelai is having difficulty speaking again. "Is everything OK with Rory?" Sookie asks.

"Rory is perfect. Always will be." Lorelai smiles weakly. "I just had to get out of town to think for a little while…"

"Then it's…hun? Why _didn't_ you call Luke to take care of Paul Anka?"

"I couldn't," she replies quickly.

"You couldn't? You guys had a fight?"

Struggling to stay calm, Lorelai nods. "A bad one. Really, really bad. In the middle of the street."

"But everything's better now? You two made up?" Sookie asks hopefully.

Lorelai shakes her head. "I haven't talked to him."

"What? Since when?"

"Friday night. The fight."

"Lorelai! You're going to marry this man. You can't avoid him forever." Sookie admonishes her.

"Sookie, I think that whole arrangement might be up for renegotiation at this point."

Looking extremely shocked, Sookie says comfortingly, "Don't be silly. You two just need to work some things out. And you will. After work, you'll go talk to him. Everything will work itself out." Lorelai doesn't look convinced. Conceding that it might not be _quite_ that easy, Sookie continues, "I know that your guys have had some issues lately, what with Luke postponing the wedding and April and all, but you two love each other. And you both _want_ to work this out. You go talk to him, and you'll see that you've built this up to be so much bigger than it really was. It was just a fight, after all."

Lorelai nods. "I suppose you're right." But she doesn't look particularly happy about the idea.

--------------------------------

Rory is walking out of an office at Yale very absorbed in reading a pamphlet. She's so absorbed, that she's not really watching where she is going as she walks. Another student is forced to press himself up against the wall in order to avoid being run over. As she winds her way out of the building, her cell phone starts to ring. Trying not to lose her place in her pamphlet, Rory blindly fumbles inside her purse to find the ringing phone. In the process she tries to exit through a partially open set of doors. She manages to find the doorway, but not an open door. She sideswipes the closed door-hard-hits herself in the face with her pamphlet and finally looks up from her reading. She manages to find her phone before it stops ringing at the same time that she successfully exits the building.

"Hello?" she says rubbing her shoulder and trying to find her place in the pamphlet.

"You sound distracted. Should I call back later?" Logan's voice says cheerfully.

"Hi!" Rory is genuinely cheerful this time as she sets the pamphlet on a nearby bench.

"That's more like it." Logan smiles.

"Sorry, I didn't know it was you."

"Then you are distracted."

"Only slightly. And never so badly as I am unable to talk to _you_." Rory flips through the pages in her booklet.

"Unable, no. But perhaps unwilling?" Logan asks jokingly.

"Never," Rory insists.

"Then put down whatever nonsense you're reading now and talk lovingly to your boyfriend who is so very far away."

Rory starts to argue, "I wasn't-" but quickly changes her story to the truth. "It isn't nonsense." Logan smiles at her through the phone, glad to see she is still being Rory. "I was reading through the course catalog."

Logan groans. "The course catalog? Classes don't start for three months yet, Ace. I think you can take your time on that decision."

"No, no. I've had my fall classes picked out for months." Logan snickers a little. "Anyway," Rory says sarcastically, trying to get him to stop laughing. "I think I'm going to take a summer class."

"You don't get enough of it during the year?" Logan asks, somewhat incredulously.

"I need to make up for some of my lost time. Besides, I don't have much else planned for this summer. With my boyfriend gone across the Atlantic." Rory fakes desolation.

"What about the job in Stamford?"

"It's only part-time. And it's only one course. I just want to make sure that I keep myself busy."

"I thought you'd be plenty busy watching over your mother."

"Mom is going to be fine. She's going to go talk to Luke tonight, and they are going to work all of this garbage out." Rory answers, convincingly nonchalant.

"Then you'll still be able to come to London for July?" Logan asks eagerly.

"Well, not for the whole month…" Rory answers regretfully. "I couldn't be gone for that long. With the class and the paper...but I could still come out...maybe for a long weekend."

"From 4 weeks to 4 days! She forgets about me so quickly…" Logan moans, only partially pretending.

"I didn't forget! There is no forgetting here!" Rory insists playfully. "But, well, I do have stuff that I have to do here, you know. My life can't end just because you've gone away. Can it? You said so yourself."

"It doesn't have to end. Just transfer a little bit…across the pond for a little while."

"I have always hated that phrase." Rory says. "It always sounds so blatantly pretensious. And if you're going to insist on using it all year, I may have to reconsider my willingness to speak with you when I have important nonsense to be reading."

"That's the last time, then. I promise."

"Excellent."

"So, I'll come see you then." Logan proposes. "In two weeks. I'll come see _you_ for a long weekend." Logan starts planning in his head. "No, maybe it'll be better if I just stay the week."

"I thought that your Dad won't let you leave until Thanksgiving?" Rory asks, hopeful that the situation had changed.

"Mitchum doesn't approve of me anyway. I might as well give him a reason for it."

"Logan, no." Rory is suddenly serious. "You can't come here if your Dad doesn't want you to."

"What?" Logan sounds a little injured.

"If you come back now, London won't stick. It's good for you. That's why you left in the first place. You have to stay. You…" she tries to find a way to explain her thoughts to Logan but has to settle for a flippant answer. "I don't want to have gone through all those goodbyes for nothing."

"Now, some of those goodbyes were worth going through," Logan said mischievously, his eyebrows raised.

Rory smiles knowingly and then asks seriously, "And if you came, would you stay for just the weekend?"

Logan doesn't answer, considering. He concedes that the answer is 'no' with a long sigh. "But I want to see you, Rory."

"Flag Day," she responds.

"Flag Day?" Logan is a little confused.

"I want to see you too, Logan. But this London thing is good for you. It's important for your future. And I don't want you ruining this chance because of me. So we'll tough it out, you and me, until Flag Day." Rory tries to make the plan sound as good as she can.

Logan is quiet for a moment, and then finally he sighs. "Alright, Ace. You win. But when exactly _is_ Flag Day?"

"July Fourteenth." Rory answers.

Logan sighs again, and then smiles. "I will find love on Flag Day. My life has become a fortune cookie fortune."

"No, no. You're love will find _you_ on Flag Day. It's a completely different thing." Rory laughs a little. "Besides, there's nothing wrong with fortune cookies. They go fantastically with Schezuan Green Beans." Rory pauses, thinking. "God, that sounds good. I think I need Chinese food."

"Happy Garden or Panda Garden?" Logan asks, smirking.

"Al's Pancake World." Rory says quickly.

"I thought you wanted Chinese?" Logan is a little bit confused.

"Al's has the best garlic chicken in Connecticut."

"I see. And how are the waffles?" Logan asks, trying to play along.

"Waffles?" Rory laughs at him like he's crazy. "Al's doesn't serve waffles, silly."

"Oh. Of course. My mistake."

There is a long pause, as neither one is sure what to say next. Rory smiles and says into her phone, "Logan Huntzburger, I do think I've fallen in love with you."

Logan exhales, happy to hear this. "That's good to know. Because I _know_ I'm in love with you. Alright, Ace. Go back to your important nonsense."

Rory smiles again and says hopefully, "I'll talk to you tomorrow?"

"I'll be thinking about you until then." Logan says with an evil smile, "From all the way across the pond."

"Oy." Rory says with a small smile as she hangs up her cell.

---------------------------------------------------

Lorelai is sitting in Weston's nursing a cup of coffee and staring intently out the window across the town square at Luke's Diner. Customers had been going in and out of the diner for the past hour, but she had not seen Luke emerge once. She had allowed herself the length of one cup of coffee to gather her thoughts and figure out what she was going to say to Luke. Which probably explained why there was still coffee in her cup.

A young girl comes by and interrupts her reverie by asking, "Do you want some more coffee?"

"Yes," she responds without thinking. Then she remembers her rule and snatches her cup back from the pouring pot. "I mean no. No thanks."

But a small amount has already been poured onto the table. "Oh no!" the waitress screams.

"Oh!" Lorelai looks shocked to see the dark liquid on the white table. "I'm so sorry!" She grabs for her napkin and starts to mop up the small spill. "I've got it, so sorry." Lorelai continues to mumble as the girl grabs a rag to clean up the rest. Having done so, the girl sends somewhat of a glare in Lorelai's direction before grabbing the coffee pot and huffing away.

"Nice one, Lorelai. Really nice." An irritated Andrew says from a nearby table.

Annoyed and embarrassed, Lorelai throws a couple of dollars on the table. As she puts on her coat she says, "It suddenly got _very_ cold in here."

Leaving the bakery she crosses the square quickly, almost without noticing where she is going. In front of the diner's steps, she stops dead in her tracks and looks up at the building. Finally, she takes a deep breath for courage and begins to walk forward again. "I have a feeling that it's going to be even colder in there." She says to no one in particular.

(commercial break)

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So, in case you couldn't tell, the Luke/Lorelai confrontation is coming up. It is sure to be a doozy, and also sure to leave everything in its' wake upturned (and possible dashed to pieces.) I promise to keep updating so long as someone is reading...


	4. Hell hath no fury

**Notes:** Thanks to everyone who is reading my version of Season 7, and double thanks to everyone who has left reviews for me. I appreciate each and every one. Now, as promised, what everyone has been waiting for...the first (of what will no doubt be many) confrontations between Luke and Lorelai. And I apologize in advance...but this is all part of my plan to stay as true to the show as I can! So enjoy, and I promise that it doesn't end here...

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The diner is rather busy, and Lane has her hands full dealing with the mass of diners. She's running back and forth between Cesar and the tables with food, pitchers and menus. The bell jingles as the diner door opens and Luke enters holding a large paper shopping bag. Lane is standing in front of a table taking an order.

"Tuna melt with extra pickles and a chicken sandwich with mayo!" Cesar yells as the plates appear from the kitchen.

Luke hurriedly drops his shopping behind the curtain in front of the staircase that leads up to his apartment. Something squeaks from inside of it as he sets it down roughly. He hurries over to the kitchen to take the plates and asks Cesar, "What table are they for?"

Just as he's about to pick them up, Lane grabs them both and says, "Don't worry. I've got it Luke. Go on upstairs."

"What?" Luke clearly thinks that Lane is crazy. He tries to take the plates from her, but she turns around deftly and escorts them over to the proper table.

"I've got everything under control here, Luke. You should go upstairs." Lane says kindly as she pulls some napkins out of her apron and places them on a table with three rowdy children at it.

Luke looks at her and says, "It's crazy down here." The annoyance is obvious in face and voice.

"It's fine!" Lane picks up some empty dishes and carries them to the kitchen. "Go!"

"Lane, this is my diner. You can't just kick me out!" He picks up the coffee pot to go hand out refills.

Lane sees him take the pot, blocks him from leaving the area behind the counter and tries to take it from him. Being a small girl, she is not successful at anything but making the veins on Luke's forehead pop out farther. "I'm not kicking you out," she sighs, keeping her hand on the coffee pot. "But I really, really think that you should go upstairs." She jerks her head in the direction of the staircase, raising her eyebrows at him. "I can handle this, Ok?"

Realizing that this is a hint of some sort, although not precisly what kind, Luke relaxes and lets Lane take the coffee pot. She does and then whisks back off to the customers. Still confused, Luke turns around, grabs his shopping back and begins to grumble his way up the stairs. "If that damn dog has gone and…" he says as he climbs up to his apartment.

Luke stops mid grumble when he opens the door. There is Paul Anka, shamelessly enjoying a tummy rub from Lorelai, who is sitting on the floor making baby talk in an annoyingly high-pitched voice at her 'lost' dog. "And I will never let anything happen to you ever again…" She kisses him on the nose and turns her head to look at Luke. "Hi." Her voice is somewhat sad, but the smile is genuine nonetheless.

"Hi." It's more a grunt than a word, but he can't keep the slight smile off of his face. It wasn't what he was expecting to see when Lane sent him upstairs, it was better. She was back, she was here, and she looked like nothing at all had happened the previous week. She looked so happy, sitting there on the floor with her dog; he couldn't help but feel a little bit of it too.

"Thank you." She said sincerely and turned her face back to Paul Anka. "We thought he had run away. I'm so glad he's safe." Luke still hadn't said anything, so Lorelai began to ramble a little bit. "I called Sookie to take care of him, but she couldn't find him, so you must have gotten there first. She'll be so relieved to know that she didn't lose Paul Anka for me. She was so worried this morning…" She stops, finally hearing herself.

Luke finds his voice and asks "Where have you been?" He flinches at his own words...he hadn't meant to sound so annoyed.

Lorelai swallows. He's already angry…not a good sign. "Yale," she answers quietly, "with Rory."

"For four days?" Lorelai's unsatisfactory response seems to fuel Luke's anger. "You just disappear to Yale for four days without telling anyone?" Lorelai tries to apologize but Luke keeps going. "You just up and leave everything to go _hang out_ with your kid?"

Lorelai shakes her head, starting to get angry herself. "Luke…"

"You even leave Paul Anka here all alone. I had to rescue him!"

"No you didn't!" Lorelai's not quite yelling, but she's forceful now. She gets up off of the floor. "Sookie was going to take care of him. I made arrangements."

"Sure you did. That's why I had to bring him here and feed him and walk him and carry him up the stairs and down the stairs and back up the stairs again."

"Nobody asked you to do any of that! What were you doing sneaking around my house anyway?" Lorelai demands. As soon as the words are out of her mouth she realizes how keenly she is interested in the answer to her question.

" I was-" he stammers as he realizes that he's caught. "I was looking for you."

Lorelai's anger dissipates instantly. "That's exactly why I wasn't there. I really didn't want to see you."

"You could have called." Luke doesn't sound mad anymore, either.

"I didn't want to talk to you either. And before you suggest smoke signals, know that I was not in a mood to be playing with matches." Lorelai says, only half jokingly.

"I was worried about you. I had no idea where you were…" he trails off.

She nods and very seriously says, "Luke," and she motions to his kitchen table.

"Now you want to talk to me?" His tone is a mixture of his deadpan humor and annoyance.

"We need to talk now." She sits in one of the chairs.

"Evidently." His face is grim as he circles the kitchen restlessly and finally settles in a chair next to and facing Lorelai. She is sitting upright, with her legs crossed, ready for what is about to happen. Luke is hunched over completely, his elbows on his knees, leaning in towards Lorelai as he wrings his hands. The silence is tense, as neither speaks for a long moment.

Luke finally looks up at Lorelai and feels the need to speak. "You know, I meant it. I absolutely want to marry you." Luke starts quickly. He looks up at her hopefully and then looks down again when he sees Lorelai close her mouth and smile sadly. "I wanted nothing else for a long time. You were the thing I needed to make my life complete. When I put that ring on your finger," he smiled in its general direction. "That's what I wanted. It's still what I want, but it's just not...not the only thing that I want. My life got more complicated, and I need some other things too. Only…" Lorelai looks at him inquisitively. "Only I'm not exactly sure what they are yet. That I, sort of, I have to figure out where April fits into all of this."

"I understand that." Lorelai says. "I've always understood that. My kid comes first with me. Yours should come first with you."

Luke smiles slightly, glad both for the support and that she isn't yelling and crying in the street. "I know you understand, you've been so patient with me until…well, I know I'm slow. But I know that I'll figure this out, and then you and me, we'll get married and we'll...we'll live happy ever after."

"I'm sure that you'll figure it out, Luke." Lorelai's voice is quiet, and sad.

"But you know that this…us…is important to me too? That you…that I…that I will marry you…I want to..." he trails off as if he's not sure what will set her off again. "I know that you were upset and…"

As Luke trails off, Lorelai knows what she has to say, and as she starts to speak, she almost sounds ready to say it. "I meant it, too." She is wringing her hands, playing with her ring. Luke nods, smiling slightly and moves towards her, reaching out to touch her leg. Lorelai lets him touch her briefly, but then gently pushes him back into his seat. "About everything. I meant it when I proposed, and when you gave me this ring," she paused and rubbed one of her eyes briefly, "and I meant it Friday night. I meant when I said that I loved you and that I wanted to be married to you." She stops again, dangerously close to crying. "And I meant that I didn't want to wait for _our_ life to start anymore. I meant _all_ of it." The emphasis is slight, but unmistakeable.

"Lorelai…?" Luke's voice is intensely questioning. He's not entirely sure what she's saying, but she wasn't smiling anymore.

"Even the now or never part," she barely manages to get the words out as tears start streaming down her face. Luke fidgets in his chair, wanting both to move forward to comfort her, and get as far away from her as he can.

"That's…not really…fair…" is all Luke can say.

"No. It's probably not." Lorelai says, wiping the tears from her face and shaking her head. "But it is how I feel. I want to be...need to be first with somebody."

"Lorelai." The word is comforting. He can't stand watching her cry. "You are, we are, so important." Luke stutters a little bit before latching onto a coherent thought. "But you said it yourself. Rory comes first in your life, and April has to come first in mine."

"I know." Lorelai says quietly. "You're not the kind of guy who can turn away from a child. _Your_ child. That's part of why I love you." She gently puts her hand on his knee, and then quickly pulls it back.

"Then why…?" He won't finish the sentence.

"We're just, not in the same place anymore," she starts seriously then adds a quick joke, "The story of my life." Sighing, she continues in a serious tone. "My daughter wants me to be happy, and that's my priority right now. But you, you have a different set of priorities."

"April wants me to be happy! I want to be happy." Luke insists.

"Well, then you don't think that being with me will do it. You don't think that you'd be happier and better with me. Or we would have done it aready, Luke." He tries to protest, but Lorelai continues. "It doesn't really matter what the reason is. You, or April, or Anna or whatever..."

"Anna? What has Anna got to do with anything?" Luke is getting loud again, but Lorelai has found her momentum and speaks over him.

"Whatever the reason, it's there." Lorelai is firm. "And well, I've waited a long time to be happy with the man I love, and I think that I deserve that."

"Of course you..." He stops talking as he begins to process what she's saying. As he does, his face goes slack and he stares towards her, but not really seeing her.

"I love you, Luke."

His head jerks up and he looks at her, thinking as hard as he can. The silence between them extends as Lorelai tries to stop crying and Luke thinks. Finally he looks up at her again and quietly and with surprising confidence says, "Lorelai, if you're going to make me choose like this again, then I -"

"No!" Lorelai interrupts him violently, standing from the table, playing with the ring on her finger. Luke watches her with a somewhat dazed look on his face. "I can't...I don't want to know what you would say. It would be too tempting…to just not tell you…everything." She looks at him. He looks confused and worried. "If you said yes, well, I don't think that I'm strong enough to resist that temptation."

Luke stands and tries to smile. He walks over to her and puts his arms around her. Luke holds her body to his chest for a brief moment, and she lets him. The tears start to well up in Lorelai's eyes again, unnoticed by Luke who says softly, "Lorelai, you know that I-"

But he doesn't get to finish. She pushes away, cutting him off. "I know, but," she looks at him significantly. He stops trying to talk when he sees the look and the tears in her eyes. "But I have to tell you everything."

Slowly, Lorelai exhales and blinks quickly to keep more tears from falling. Finally, she looks back at Luke fondly. "I didn't spend four nights at Yale with Rory," she says simply.

Luke looks even more confused, "What?"

"I spent three nights at Yale with Rory, and one night in Boston," Luke is still searching for the meaning in her words, when she finishes her sentence, "with Christopher."

The shock and pain are obvious on Luke's face. Breath seems to leave him as he processes the name and its meaning. "With Christopher," he echoes, his voice a mere croak, as if he had been punched in the stomach.

Loreali is crying again, quietly. "I'm sorry." She says quietly. He glares at her. "I'm so, so, so, so sorry. But I had to tell you. You deserve to know the truth."

"I…" Luke stumbles back to the chair and sits heavily.

Loreali moves towards him and kneels on the floor in front of him, with her hands on his knees. "I'm so sorry, and so disgusted with myself, so sorry." She says to him. She reaches up to his face, but he pulls back. She nods in understanding and stands up, but stays close to the table. "Everything has changed now, I know. First with April, and now with…Chris," she almost chokes on his name and Luke flinches visibly as she says it. "I'm sorry. And I love you. But you can see now that…" she's crying uncontrollably now. She can't finish her sentence. With a slight motion, she drops something with a small clink on the table and then runs out the door and down the stairs.

Luke sits alone in his dark apartment for a long moment, staring at the light streaming in from the diner through the open apartment door. After he finally begins to breathe normally again, he turns his head towards his kitchen table. Shining in that dim, eerie light is a ring. Lorelai's engagement ring. Instantly irate, he stands, and grabs the shopping bag that he brought up the stairs with him and throws it at the wall with all of the force of his anger. The bag squeals cheerfully as it hits the wall and falls to the ground.

Paul Anka starts at the noise and runs out the still open door.

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The door to Lorelai's house opens a little bit, but no one comes through immediately. Then Rory can be seen, holding the door open with her bottom as she bends down to grab two very large Al's bags from the porch. Getting in the door, Rory slams it shut, again with her butt and walks in towards the living room, expecting to see her mom watching TV. Seeing nothing but reruns playing to an empty room, she walks into the kitchen and puts the food on the table.

"Mom?" she calls as she walks back into the living room. She gets no response, so turns the TV off and tries again, "Mom?"

"Rory?" Lorelai's surprised voice answers from upstairs.

"Hi Mom," Rory yells up the stairs. "I brought dinner. Have you eaten?"

"Pizza," Lorelai answers, and Rory sees the box in the coffee table. "But what did you bring?" Lorelai's sticks her head down the stairs, carefully hiding the rest of her body from view.

"A broad assortment of Chinese-y goodness." Rory answers, looking up at her mother's floating head. "Come down and I'll show you."

Lorelai shakes her head emphatically. "You brought me peking duck from the Panda Garden?" she asks excitedly.

"Umm, no." Rory replies, somewhat guiltily for having forgotten one of her mother's favorites. Lorelai's face falls a little. "But there's Kung Pao Chicken from Al's." Lorelai perks up again. "Come down," Rory nods her head in the direction of the kitchen.

Lorelai shakes her head again and says "I'll be down soon. I've just got to take care of something up here…" her head disappears.

"Mom…" Rory says suspiciously. "What's going on?"

"Nothing, hun." Lorelai's face reappears. "You go set up the food, and I'll be down in three minutes." She disappears again.

Rory walks into the kitchen and starts taking containers out of the bags. "Come on, Mom. I don't care what you're wearing, I'm really hungry!" Getting no response, Rory abandons the takeout and starts to walk up the stairs towards her mother's room. "Are you naked up here? Afraid of getting duck sauce where it doesn't belong?" Rory jokes as she climbs. The joke gets no response and Rory starts to get a little bit worried. "Mom, are you sure everything is Ok?"

"It's fine, everything is fine, sweets." Lorelai's voice sounds a little strained. "I promise, I'll be down in a minute, ow!"

At the sound of her mother's squeal and the 'thud' that followed, Rory immediately rushes to open the door. Finding it locked, she screams, "Mom! What's the matter? Mom!"

"Nothing," Lorelai says from inside the room.

"What was that noise, then?" Rory demands.

"Rory, I said that I'd be down-"

"Oh! Oh my God!" Realization dawns on rory's face and she suddenly looks embarrassed. "You are naked! Luke's in there! I'm so sorry, I should have called first." Rory backs away from the door and nervously calls, "Hi Luke!" She gets no response.

"Noooo, that's not…" Lorelai's voice is still strained as she tries to explain through the door.

"Is it…Dad?" Rory asks, even more nervously.

"No!" Lorelai is disgusted but unlocks the door.

When Rory hears the tiny click she enters the room and finds her mother sitting on the edge of her bed wearing her wedding dress. The dress is partially unzipped in the back and the veil has been thrown on the floor near the bathroom. Lorelai looks flustered. Rory sees her mother and the dress and a huge smile erupts on her face. "I'm so happy for you!" Rory squeals, running over to her mom and tackling her with a full body hug. "Did you guys set the new date?" Rory throws Lorelai onto the bed and giggles happily.

"Rory…" Lorelai tries to speak.

"Oh! I'm wrinkling the bride!" And she lets go of her mother and lets Lorelai stand up.

"Rory…Luke and I…we're not getting married." Lorelai struggles to tell her daughter.

"What? Why not?" Rory looks crushed.

"Awww, hon." She sees the sadness and disappointment in her daughter's face. "You know we can't get married now, not after, well, everything that's happened."

"But you love him," Rory insists, "and he-"

"Doesn't want to look at me," Lorelai finishes. Rory startes to ask more questions, but no words actually come out. Lorelai sits down on the bed next to Rory and gives her daughter the gentlest hug that she can. "I told him, Rory. I told him everything."

"But…"

"I had to tell him, kiddo. You know that."

Rory is quiet, and then nods. "I just wanted…"

"I wanted it too, honey." Lorelai says comfortingly, hugging her daughter.

"This is all backwards," Rory laughs a little. "I'm supposed to be comforting you."

Lorelai smiles and hugs Rory a little tighter. "Oh, you are. No need to worry about that."

The two sit in silence on the bed for a moment and then Rory's voice, slightly muffled by her mother's embrace, says, "Mom?" Lorelai pulls away to let her daughter breathe. "So, then, uh, why are you wearing the wedding dress?"

"Oh!" Lorelai laughs, a little embarrassed. "Well, I was making a box and I…"

"A Luke box?" Rory's voice is sad and high-pitched. "I never thought we'd have to make a Luke box."

"Well, now we get to." Rory's eyebrows raised at her mother choice of words. "But I just thought that it would be fun to wear it one last time before I packed it away forever."

Rory nods in understanding. "It is a perfect dress, after all."

"Not anymore! I can't get out of it!" Lorelai says, standing and trying to look at the partially zipped zipper on her back. "I think it's stuck." She twirls around like a dog chasing its tail before Rory can grab hold of her and tries to work the zipper loose.

As she unzips the dress she whispers, "I'm sorry, Mom."

"Don't be kid. I'll be fine. I don't even think that I need a babysitter anymore. Seeing as how I'm all growned up and all." Rory laughs. "After all, I'm not the one who set the curtains on fire and swallowed a lego astronaut!"

"I was four!" Rory exclaims and then says, "And actually, it _was_ you who set the curtains on fire."

"Oh," Lorelai seems not entirely surprised. "I remember, I tried to make spaghetti!" she laughs fondly at the memory. "But seriously…"

"Seriously, I'm not playing babysitter. I had a craving for Al's garlic chicken. Ask Logan if you don't believe me."

"Mmmmm." Lorelai mumbles. "There's garlic chicken down there?" Rory nods. "Let's go!" She starts out the door, still in her dress.

"Mom! You'll ruin it!" Rory says pointing to the white dress.

"Who cares? I'm not wearing it again anyway!" And she runs out of the door.

(commercial break)

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Hate me if you will! Berate me if you will! Love me if you dare! But never forget that I am merely attempting to mimic the minds of ASP, who has led us to the disatrous point in which we now find ourselves and our beloved Luke and Lorelai. And yes, this story is LL...but oh! the twisted path they will take to get there! Keep reading, and I promise that your faithfullness will be rewarded. Coming next: Friday Night Dinner with the elder Gilmores! Review, and it may come sooner.


	5. Frozen Over

**Notes:**I realized last night how little time is left before the actual season premiere renders my little story useless and wrong. So I will attempt to get this out a little bit faster...

Read, review and as always, enjoy!

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Rory is leaning against her car in front of the Gilmore mansion as her mother drives up. Lorelai gets out of her jeep and trudges over to her daughter unhappily. "I can't believe that I'm back here already."

"Well, it's been a week. And once a week," Rory says, trying to cheer her mother up, "like it or not…"

"Not!" Lorelai interjects.

"Friday rolls around. And with it…" they walk up to the front door.

"Hell." Lorelai says in her best evil, death-metal voice as she rings the doorbell.

The door is opened by a young maid dressed in a full length wool overcoat, who in a very cheerful voice says, "Hello!" and lets them into the house. "Mr. and Mrs. Gilmore are outside on the back patio," the maid says just as cheerfully.

"Thanks," Lorelai says quickly as the girls walk towards the living room, casting curious backwards glances at the maid as they go.

"It's awfully cheerful, here in hell." Rory jokes when the maid is out of earshot.

As they make their way through the living room towards the patio doors, they start wrapping their arms around themselves and rubbing their arms. "And awfully cold, too," Lorelai complains, shivering and hurrying to open the doors to the patio.

As Lorelai opens the door, she almost knock over a heavily laden coat rack. Emily flinches at the cold air that the girls let outside while Richard smiles broadly at them. "Hello girls!"

"Hi grandpa! Hi grandma! Rory says as she shuts the door behind them.

"Are we turning the house into an igloo now?" Lorelai asks sarcastically.

"Well, hello to you too, Lorelai," Richard says formally, ignoring her comment.

"Hi Dad. Hi Mom." Lorelai says, dutifully. "But seriously, what's with the iceberg. I didn't bring my mukluks tonight."

Rory giggles to herself, "Mukluk. What a great word." Lorelai and Rory smile at each other mischievously.

"It's true. Mukluk. Mukluk." Lorelai chants playfully.

"Oh girls! Please don't start!" Emily sighs with exasperation.

"What, Mom?" Lorelai asks innocently. "I'm just teaching my daughter the importance of keeping her Eskimo shoes clean."

Emily looks thoroughly confused and angry at the same time. Rory giggles again, "You mean that I shouldn't muck my mukluks?"

"Brilliant, daughter of mine!" Lorelai says, laughing.

"Can't you see that I have enough to deal with already?" Emily sighs again.

"Why yes, mother. That cross that you're hauling around must be getting awfully heavy after all these years. Wouldn't you like to put it down and join the fun?"

Emily glares at Lorelai who tries, unsuccessfully, to wipe the smile off of her face.

"Too far, mother of mine." Rory whispers playfully to her mother. Lorelai shrugs in response.

"Sit, girls. Dinner should be ready soon." Lorelai and Rory sit down on a small padded couch. "What would you like to drink? Lorelai? Something strong, I presume? Perhaps gin and a sedative?"

"Mmmmm…Gin." Lorelai muses. "Martini, please."

"Rory?" Emily asks, moving to make the drinks.

"White wine would be fine." Emily fixes the drinks.

"So seriously, Mom. Why is the house so cold? You guys did notice the icicles forming on the crystal, right?" Emily does not look amused with Lorelai. "Ooooh, I'm sorry. Is it a secret? Is mom going through _the change_?"

Rory elbows her mother in the side and hisses, "Mom! Be nice."

"No." Lorelai hisses back.

"Well, be nic_er._" Rory concedes.

Lorelai crosses her arms and pouts a little but agrees with a hissed, "Fine."

Emily crosses the patio and hands Rory and Lorelai their drinks. Thrusting the martini into Lorelai's face she says roughly, "Be quiet and drink this," before returning to her seat.

"Yes, Mommy," Lorelai says with a grin as she takes a large sip of her martini.

"So, is the air conditioner broken?" Rory asks politely.

"Yes, and it's been like this all day. And the damnable repairman said that he would be here by 5, and he still hasn't shown up." Emily answers in a distressed tone of voice.

"Well, have you tried turning the thermostat up?" Lorelai asks between sips.

"No!" Richard answers in mock innocence, his eyebrows high and his eyes wide. "We never thought to do that! We just decided to sit out on the patio instead."

"Sorry." Lorelai says quickly and takes another gulp of martini.

"So, Rory. Did Logan make it to London alright?" Emily asks.

"Yeah, he's getting himself settled and he's almost over the jet-lag."

"But I bet he still misses _you_." Emily raises her glass in Rory's direction with a smile.

"Well, of course he does. And with good reason!" Richard says, copying Emily's gesture. Rory smiles embarrassedly.

"So, when are going to go visit him across the pond?" Emily asks as Rory groans slightly.

"Oh, not until July."

Emily and Richard look slightly disappointed. "July? Really?" Emily asks.

"Well, we both decided it was best to wait a little while to make sure that he got used to things in London." Rory explains.

"Both of you?" Emily asks.

"Yes, both of us." Rory answers confidently. Lorelai giggles in the seat next to her.

"What is so funny, Lorelai?" Emily asked, annoyed before she even hears the answer.

"I was just trying to remember if Mukluk was the Eskimo word for "boot" or for "whale blubber."" Lorelai explains and Rory hides a giggle.

"Drink, Lorelai." Emily commands.

"All gone!" Lorelai says happily, proudly displaying her empty glass.

Emily to starts to stand up, but Richard puts out his hand to stop her and says, "No, no. I'll get it." And he gets up to make the drink himself.

At that point the maid sticks her head out of the door and politely says, "Mrs. Gilmore?"

"Yes, Pilar?" Emily answers.

"Dinner is ready, ma'am."

"Thank you, Pilar." Emily answers. "We'll be in in just a moment."

"Yes, ma'am." She closes the door and returns to the kitchen.

"What? You've got to be kidding?" Lorelai spits out. "It's 25 degrees in there!" Her tone of voice changes instantly in an attempt to be charming an convincing. "Why don't we eat out here? It's a beautiful night…"

Emily scoffs as she stands up. "Have dinner outside? Don't be absurd, Lorelai."

"I'm not being absurd. Outside there are stars, and the moon, and _warmth_."

Rory looks hopeful, but her face falls when Emily scoffs again. Richard chimes in from the drink cart, "Your mother's right, Lorelai. We will not be having dinner on the patio like swine." He chuckles a little bit as he walks over towards Lorelai. When she starts to protest again, Richard interrupts her and hands her a full martini. "Drink this and be quiet."

"Yes, Daddy." Lorelai says grumpily taking a swig of her drink.

Lorelai and Rory stand and walk towards Emily who is standing by the doors. "Allright," she says in a very cheerful voice, "Everybody take a coat."

Rory and Lorelai go over to the coat rack and select the warmest coats they can find. As they put them on, Lorelai whispers to Rory, "I am so glad you're here tonight, kid."

"Oh, it won't be that bad," Rory whispers back, helpfully.

"No. Not that." Lorelai whispers. Rory looks at her confused. "We're going to need all of the body heat we can get in that house."

Rory rolls her eyes and puts on her coat.

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The Gilmores are in the dining room, eating their dinners. They are all wearing heavy winter coats and other assorted winter gear. Richard is sporting a pair of red plaid earmuffs. Emily is eating as daintily as she can with a beret on her head and leather gloves on her hands. Rory has a scarf, wool gloves and hat, and has to remove and replace the scarf every time she takes a bite. Lorelai is wearing a hat with a poof and a strange look of happiness mingled with frustration as she tries to cut her chicken without taking off her big woolen mittens. No one is saying anything.

"This is fun!" Lorelai says sarcastically as she tries to cut a piece of chicken and winds up dropping both fork and knife on the plate. Rory smiles indulgently at her mother.

Emily looks up at the clatter and says, "Just eat your chicken before it gets cold, Lorelai."

"Ha!" (That sharp intake of breath LG does so often.) "Mom, this chicken was freezing when it got out here. The silverware is too cold to touch!"

"No it isn't," Emily answers briskly without looking up.

"Then why are you wearing gloves at the dinner table?"

"Lorelai," Emily starts in exasperation. "We have all realized that it is cold in the house. It is unfortunate, but unavoidable. So I suggest that you try not to focus on it and enjoy our evening together."

"May I have another martini?"

"No, I think three is plenty for one night," Emily sighs.

"But they keep me warm," Lorelai whines. When no one answers, she goes back to trying to cut her chicken, and the table lapses back into silence.

After a few moments, and another clatter from Lorelai, Emily sighs and says, "Oh, this is just ridiculous! Richard!" He doesn't look up from his plate. "Richard!" She tries again, louder this time, but still gets no response. "Oh, Rory, would you…" she points to her husband.

Rory reaches around the table and gently taps her grandfather on the arm. Richard looks up at Rory who smiles and nods her head in Emily's direction. When he see the look on her face he asks with a chuckle, "What is wrong, Emily? Besides the chicken being half-frozen?"

"Take off those dreadful earmuffs!" Emily orders.

Richard doesn't hear and looks confused. He then reaches up and takes off the offending ear-wear. "What was that, Emily?" He asks. "I can't hear a thing with these things on."

"That's exactly the problem, Richard!" Emily snaps. "We can't have any conversation at all with you in those dreadful things. Keep them off."

"If you insist, Emily," he says sighing and coiling the earmuffs neatly on the table. "But I do ask that if my ears fall off of my head and onto the floor that nobody step on them lest they shatter into the proverbial million pieces."

"Very funny, Richard." Emily's words echo as everyone returns to their cold dinners and Lorelai finally manages to spear a piece of chicken. Her silent cheers across the table to Rory are interrupted by an Emily who is insistent on starting a conversation.

"So, Lorelai. How are things going at the inn?"

"Oh!" Lorelai does her best to look sober quickly and tries to think of an appropriate answer. "The Dragonfly is doing very well. We're fairly well booked already for the summer, there are a couple of big events coming up, so I should be pretty busy over the next couple of months."

"That's good," Emily responds.

"Yes, it is," Richard agrees, trying to appease Emily's need for conversation but finding nothing else to say on the topic. Trying another topic he asks, "And how is Luke?"

A shocked look immediately appears on Lorelai's face. Rory looks up worriedly at her mother. Bravely, Lorelai says, "He's, well, he's…" sighing she shrugs her shoulders and says, "I have no idea."

"And just what is _that_ supposed to mean?" Emily asks shrilly.

"Oh, don't worry about it, Emily. It was just another one of Lorelai's little jokes." Richard says soothingly to his wife while sending a chastising look to his daughter.

"It wasn't a joke," Lorelai says in a wounded tone.

"Certainly not a very funny one..." Emily mumbles under her breath as she pretends to be intensly interested in her meal.

"No one ever does. Lorelai's jokes are only ever funny to Lorelai." Richard says with an air of expertise.

Lorelai looks extremely offended, "Not true! And besides-"

Emily interrupts Lorelai with a loud, high pitched scoff.

Rory, looking extermely uncomfortable and squirmy in her seat raises her hand tentatively and says, "I think that Mom's jokes are funny."

Lorelai tilts her head and looks at her daughter lovingly. "Aww. Thanks, hon. But if you value your inheritance, I wouldn't say that again."

Rory shrugs her shoulders helplessly.

"Really, Lorelai." Richard sounds annoyed and impatient. "Your mother and I are just trying to start a simple, polite conversation. I don't know why you can't simply participate like an adult instead of treating everything like some rediculous joke."

"Ah! But see how much brilliant conversation my little joke has sparked?" Lorelai points out. "And on your favorite subject, too: The many failings of Lorelai."

"Really..." Richard is exasperated.

Emily looks up from her plate. "I thought you said it wasn't a joke."

"It wasn't."

"Then it didn't spark anything," Emily also sounds annoyed.

"What would you have had to talk about and berate me for otherwise?"

Emily sniffs, "Whatever it was that we were talking about before your interrupted with you little _joke_."

"Which was nothing," Lorelai says insistently.

"You know," Richard chuckles, "I don't even remember what your joke was about." He smiles towards Lorelai.

Lorelai looks relieved as Emily smiles a little too, trying to remember.

Rory smiles and quickly answers, "Mom said that she didn't know how Luke was doing..." Halfway through her sentence Rory realizes that it was the wrong thing to say, and fades off instead of stopping her sentence.

Lorelai shrugs her shoulders and shakes her head as if to ask Rory, "What the hell was that?" But instead she says, "You know, you don't have to know the answer _all_ the time."

Rory shrugs and very guiltily says, "Sorry."

"Ah, yes," Richard nods at Rory's answer.

"But it wasn't a joke?" Emily's question is more of a statement. Lorelai only half nods in response, hoping that the subject would go away. "Then what did you mean by it?"

Lorelai looks up at Rory for help, who offers none but instead sits silently while chewing on her lip nervously under her scarf. Finally, unable to think of a way to change the subject she exhales slowly and says, "What did I mean? Well, I guess I meant that I have no idea how Luke is. Physically, I believe him to be well. But emotionally, well, to be honest, I hope that he's miserable. But I really couldn't tell you. We- we split up." The last sentence looks painful for her to say.

"You what?" Richard asks horrified at the same time that Emily practically shrieks. "I knew it!"

Trying desperately to ignore her mother, Lorelai looks pointedly at her father as she answers. "We broke up. A week ago. Last Friday."

"Last Friday you were here!" Emily sounds angry.

"Well, as interminable as that night felt, you did let me leave eventually."

"And you went home and broke up with your fiancé? We should have made you stay!"

"And that would have solved everything. If only I had stayed at dinner longer then Luke would have wanted to marry me and we would still be together." The sarcasm is evident in Lorelai's voice. The anger is harder for Emily to detect.

She is quiet for a moment. "What did you do?" Emily demands.

"What! Why is this automatically my fault?" Lorelai is insulted.

"You do have something of a habit of breaking up with men." Richard answers.

"This was not my fault." Lorelai looks injured and Rory is busy trying to think of a way out of the conversation when Richard commands, "Now, why don't you want to marry _this_ one? Not that there aren't perfectly legitimate reasons, mind you. But engagements are not meant to be broken, Lorelai."

"You really setting a horrible example for Rory," Emily said with a disspointed tone.

"I didn't break the engagement!" Lorelai says, almost hysterical at having to relive this yet again. "He ended it. He doesn't want to marry me! Alright? I begged him to marry me! I did everything that I could to make him see how important and, and, and…right our relationship was! But he wouldn't go for it. _He _wouldn't marry _me!_" She is almost crying again by the end of her rant. She looks up at her parents, expecting some sympathy.

Instead, she finds Emily with an incredulous look on her face who says, "Begged? You begged him? Did you hear her Richard? She begged the poor _shlub_, and he said no!" Emily scoffs derisively.

Richard laughs and says, "Why yes, Emily. I did hear. She must be telling one of her funny jokes again. Begged him to marry her! Ha! You may need to try some more believable material," Richard continues to mock her.

"I did!" Lorelai is hurt. Rory looks shocked that her grandparents would act this way. "In the middle of the street, I begged him."

"Of course you did, Lorelai. Because that is so like you, to beg someone for anything, let alone to marry you. And it seems so likely that the _diner owner_ would turn down a beautiful, intelligent woman throwing herself at him in the street." Emily says in her meanest voice.

Rory chimes in, trying to save her mother, "Grandma, Grandpa. This isn't a joke. I really don't think it's fair for you to…"

But Emily interrupts, even angrier, "Even if he did decide not to marry you, I know you Lorelai Gilmore. You've never begged anyone for anything in your entire life. You demand, you require. You do not beg. You cannot just order a man to do something that he doesn't want to do!"

Lorelai shakes her head in disbelief. "But if he didn't want to do it..." she starts to explain but is quickly drowned out by her mother.

"I knew that it was a mistake to announce the engagement in the papers!"

"Now I have to tell the boys at the club that she's cancelling yet another wedding…"

As Richard and Emily continue to loudly discuss the horrors of Lorelai's existence very loudly, Lorelai slowly leans towards her father's end of the long dining table. When her arm reaches the end of the table, she grabs red plaid earmuffs and slaps them on her head as quickly as possible. As the commotion continues around her she whispers through the noise at Rory, "Man, is it cold in here."

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Lorelai's jeep is parked in front of Doose's market. She is leaning on the hood, biting on the ends of her fingers while staring up the street. Nodding reassuringly to herself, she stands and begins to walk up the block. She stops in front of the diner, staring up at the building again. She can see Luke inside this time, moving around inside the kitchen. Hoping that this visit will go better than the last one, Lorelai resolutely walks up the stairs and opens the door to the diner.

jingle jingle

Luke pokes his head out of the kitchen at the sound. He sees Lorelai standing in front of the door, and his face stays stony. "I'm closing," he says.

"As well you should be. It's quite late." Lorelai answers, trying for cute and flippant, but failing.

"I don't have any coffee."

"I don't want coffee. I—I wanted to talk to you. I wanted to apologize."

"Listen, this really isn't a great time to do this again." Luke grumbles as he comes out of the kitchen to wipe off the tables.

"I'll be quick," she promises and she begins to follow him around the diner as he works. "I just want to tell you that I'm very sorry. And, can I ask you a question?" Luke looks up at her, acknowledging her words with the slightest of head nods. "How long is forever?"

"What?"

"Well, umm, I hate that you are mad at me."

"Lorelai, you went to-" Luke sounds angry

"I know! And I'm sorry for that...for everything. You have every right to hate me forever. Only," she looks up at him significantly, "How long is forever?"

Luke's face softens slightly as he understands what she is saying. "Forever is a long time, Lorelai. And since I obviously don't know what is going to happen in the future…" he shrugs.

"Ok. I understand. I just thought...ok" She turns to leave, and opens the door with another jingle before turning back to face him with an apologetic face. "I meant to beg, I don't think I did that very well." And then steps out the door.

"Lorelai!" Luke calls and she stops the door from closing but doesn't turn around. "I don't know how long..." She nods slightly and smiles before letting the door close behind her and walking away.

After the door shuts and Luke stares at it for a moment until April come down the stairs and out from behind the curtain. "Packed and ready to go!" She announces holding up her backpack. "Was that Lorelai?"

"Huh?" Luke breaks his stare with the door to look at his daughter. "Yeah, Lorelai."

"Did she come to get her ring?"

"What?"

"Her engagement ring. I saw it upstairs on your bedside table. Did she want it?"

Luke looks down at April and then back at the door. "No, I don't think so." He sighs a little.

"Well she'll get it next time she's here. You ready to go?"

"Yup, let's get you home," Luke feigns cheerfulness as he grabs April's backpack and heads towards the door.

(Commerical break)

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So the episode is almost over, but there is more planned if people are interested. And I have decided that the FND is my favorite scene. I hope you enjoyed reading it as much as I enjoyed writing it! Leave some love!


	6. Gilmores in the Corner

A couple of notes to my reviewers before this chapter gets started. First: Yes, the story will most likely stay ROGAN mostly because I think Rory should have to go through the same thing almost every young girl has had to go through at some point: a long distance relationship. So no, Logan will _not_ be returning to CT.

And second (to bballman): In Lorelai's mind, the breakup occured when Luke wouldn't marry her, not when she slept with Christopher. Hence the comment about it not being her fault. If she meant everything that she said in the street that night (which I claim that she did) then the question remains, if she hadn't slept with Christopher, would she have gone straight back to Luke? She was not happy as she was, and Lorelai is not a woman of half-actions. If she felt that something needed to change, then she would have changed it.

So here it is...Enjoy!

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Lorelai is at home on her couch, covered by a blanket, watching a movie. She has several open containers of Chinese food spread out on the table in front of her and she's eating out of another. When the phone rings, she pauses her movie and answers with a mouth full of food. "Hello?" The word is muffled by the green beans in her mouth.

"You should learn not to speak with your mouth full. Perhaps it is your awful manners that scares the men away…" Rory jokes on the other end of the line.

"Maybe," Lorelai smiles somewhat ruefully. "That or when I sleep with my ex-boyfriends."

"Uhh…" Rory doesn't know quite what to say.

"Too soon?" Lorelai asks.

"Much."

"Right. So. What's up?"

"Not much. Bored."

"Bored? You're young; you have five hundred channels! You can't be bored."

"Can too!" Rory pouts. "Campus is empty, classes are over and my boyfriend moved to London."

"Gilmore, pity party of one. Your table is ready."

"Sorry. I didn't mean to interrupt you glamorous evening with ramblings about my pathetic life."

"Not so glamorous, just left over Chinese and Dirty Dancing: Havana Nights."

Rory laughs and we finally see her looking very much like her mother, sitting on her couch wrapped in a blanket, an open pizza box on the table in front of her.

"I've got pizza and the original," she laughs, grabbing a slice.

Lorelai laughs. "Patrick Swayze looks so much better in yours!" she says, mocking jealousy.

"I know," Rory says happily.

"But I've got Diego Luna, who is gorgeous _and _exotic," Lorelai gloats.

"True. But ever since I saw _Y tu Mama Tambien_, I can't quite look at him the same way…"

"Ehhh. He still makes me want to go to Cuba."

"You know, I'd bet that he actually lives in the U.S."

Lorelai's eyebrows shoot up. "Really? _That_ makes me glad to live in America!" She laughs.

Rory laughs with her mother and then tries to casually ask, "So…what's up?"

Lorelai laughs again, but this time it is cynical and knowing. "Nothing since the last time you called which was…" Lorelai looks at the clock, "Five hours ago. Almost to the minute. I really don't need a baby-sitter, hon."

"I'm not trying to-" Rory protests.

"Yeah you are." Lorelai is smiling. "And the thought is very much appreciated. But I really am going to be fine. It will just take some getting used to, is all."

"Ok," Rory concedes, trying to sound cheerful. "Well, then I am going to get back to my _very_ exciting evening. But I want you to remember one thing."

"What's that, kiddo?"

"Nobody puts Baby in the corner," Rory answers, very seriously.

"I carried a watermelon!" Lorelai happily screams in response.

"G'night, mom."

"Bye, sweetie."

Lorelai unpauses the movie and watches for a moment and then picks up the telephone and dials a number. After a few moments she says tentatively, "Hi. It's me." She waits as someone answers. "Well, I really didn't expect to be calling so soon. But you know how it is…bad dance movies can only keep me entertained for so long."

"That was different!" Lorelai protests, laughing. She stops, listening. "Well, obviously. It _is_ one of the greatest movies of all time." She answers and waits for the response. "I take offense to that comment, but I just…I just wanted to thank you." Pause. "Yeah. Everything is kind of a mess right now, and it's all my fault, but I'm glad I have you around. I don't think I'd be able to get through it if you weren't so good to me."

Another pause as Lorelai waits for a response.

"No, really. It's great to have someone around who knows me so well," she says.

"I know the feeling, Lor." Only now can we see who Lorelai is talking to. "But you'd have done the same for me," Chris says sincerely. "In fact, you have."

"Well…" Lorelai can't think of anything else to say, so after a long pause, Chris starts to talk.

"So, how have you been?" he asks, surprisingly cheerfully.

"Ummm…it's actually been a rough couple of days," Lorelai tries to match his tone, as if nothing had happened and they hadn't spoken in weeks.

"Really? I can't imagine. But I bet you're ready for a change of subject?"

"Absolutely," Lorelai actually looks cheerful at the prospect.

"Great!" Chris smiles and changes to a whisper. "I think my boss is sleeping with the UPS guy."

Lorelai giggles and starts asking questions. We start to zoom way out, so that we are seeing her on the phone through the window, and through the closing music we can hear her ask, "And does David's wife know about it?" And then she laughs again at the response.

(Black screen: Written by DaliaFlower)

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And there ends the first episode of Daliaflower's Season 7. A horrible spot for a story that is supposed to be Luke & Lorelai themed. But, alas. I do have two or three more episodes floating around in my head. And if there is some demand, then I will allow them to float around on the internet instead. Tell me what you thought. And I do promise that L&L will get themselves together...eventually.


	7. Off With Her Head

AN: My apologies for the rediculously long delay in publishing Episode 2. But life got in the way. And while it is still getting in the way, I would very much like to put the rest of my story out there to counteract some of the negative Chris/Lorelai karma that's floating around right now. And while this story might not make you feel better immediately about that whole mess, I hope that you enjoy it anyway.

And now, the beginning of Episode 2 of my own personal season 7. Read, review and enjoy...

* * *

It is dark in Lorelai's bedroom and we can only see her by some moonlight shining in through the window. She is in her pajamas, under the blankets, in bed…alone. She is on the phone and from the slight smile on her lips, she appears to be enjoying her conversation. "But they were just poking at it, and the kid would kick or itch just depending on where they touched," she explains in a rather disgusted, high-pitched voice. "And the kid was talking the whole time. He would say "That's a light bulb" or "my nose itches" just like everything was normal."

"Uh huh."

"But his head was off!" Lorelai talks animatedly, her free hand explaining her obvious disgust with wild gestures. "The whole top of his head had been detached from the rest of him and they were poking at his brain!"

"Well, I'm not a doctor," Christopher responds reasonably, "But I believe that in order to perform brain surgery, you must have access to the brain. Which, in most people, and again, I have no medical degree to back this up, is located in their head."

"I _know_ that," Lorelai says, somewhat impatiently, "That's not the point. He was talking coherently, awake, and could _feel his nose itch_, but he couldn't tell that his head was off!"

"I'm sure he was on some crazy drugs, Lor."

"Ok, but what if my head is off, and I just don't know it?"

"Because of all the drugs that you did in your crazy youth?" Chris asks with a laugh.

"Well, I can feel when my nose itches. And I can talk coherently-"

"That is the subject of serious debate in psychological circles," Chris interjects.

"_And _I can identify a light bulb!" Lorelai continues, pointedly ignoring him. "So what if _my_ head is off, and I just don't know it?"

Chris rolls his eyes slightly and answers with the only logical response he can come up with. "Alright, no more _House_ for you."

"But what else am I supposed to watch on Tuesday nights?" Lorelai asks sullenly.

"You could always try just going out and _doing_ something instead of watching medical dramas." Lorelai scoffs at his suggestion. "Lorelai Gilmore, certainly _you_ of all people could find something interesting to do," Chris mock-chastises her.

"But not nearly as interesting as-"

"Infinitely more interesting than diagnostic medicine." Chris responds firmly before she can even finish her sentence. Lorelai doesn't respond and she is looking somewhat distraught. After a moment of silence Chris asks, "Lorelai? Lor, you there?"

"Yes," she answers, her voice wavering.

"Lorelai," Chris says authoritatively. "You're head is _not_ off."

"Are you sure?" Lorelai whines as she reaches up to check.

"Yeah, but you better sleep with your head under the pillow to make sure it stays that way," Chris teases. Lorelai clutches her skull firmly, smashing her hair down into her face. After a long pause while Christopher laughs he asks, "What were they poking with?"

"What?" Lorelai asks, confused at the seemingly sudden change in conversation topic.

"What were they poking him with? Sticks? Scalpels?"

"I don't really know," Lorelai starts and clutches her head harder.

"Their bare fingers?" Chris asks with a smirk.

"Ewwwww! Chris!!" She squints her eyes.

"No, you're right. I'm sure they wear gloves." Chris is smiling with an evil glow in his eyes.

"That's it, I'm going now." Lorelai declares.

"It is late," Chris says, glancing at the clock beside his bed. "We should get some sleep. I can do some research and finish this _discussion _tomorrow night."

"Research? Gonna take a crash course in nuerosurgery? Or just look it up on Wikipedia?" Lorelai teases.

"Good night, Lor. And say hi to Rory for me," Chris says.

"G'night, Chris." Lorelai hangs up the phone, and then slowly puts it down on her bedside table. She carefully pulls the blankets up around her, mashes her pillows to make them more comfortable, and lies down. After a brief second, she pulls a pillow out from under her, lies with her head flat on the mattress instead and holds the pillow protectively over her head and hisses, "Damn House."

(Roll Intro)

* * *

Leave love or hate, and I will update soon! 


	8. Departures and Arrivals

**AN: **This is the continuation of episode two of my version of season 7. The goal, of course, is to find some way to get Luke and Lorelai back together in the most realistic, true-to-the-show way that I can. Which, unfortunately, takes some time. (But not nearly as long as David Rosenthal seems to be taking with it.) I really do love reviews and suggestions for improvements...enjoy!!

**LLTogetherForever:** Thanks for your frequent (and so sweet) reviews! It's nice to know that someone is reading and enjoying themselves. And yes, Tuesday wouldn't be the same without a fight between me and my roommates over the remote control.

**borncountry88:** Well, no, they have some issues to work through (Like Christopher.) before I can legitimately see them back together. But never fear, this chapter begins the slow downfall of Christopher.

**Luke-n-LorelaiLuva6292:** Thanks for the love and reviews. Heads will roll...eventually.

* * *

"How is it possible that _all_ of this stuff fit into this tiny little bag?" Rory asks incredulously, waving the offending piece of luggage in the air. On the bed in front of her is a fairly large pile of clothes, books, a laptop, several pairs of shoes and Logan. He is lying on his stomach, watching her tirade with a trickle of amusement on his face.

"I don't know why you bothered to bring all of that anyway," Logan smiles, fueling the fire. "You didn't wear most of it." His smile is slick and one eyebrow is raised.

Rory fights the impulse to smile and say "Dirty!" like her mother would, and instead yells, "Logan! Help!"

"I'm not Mary Poppins, Ace."

"Logan!"

Logan springs upright at Rory's tone of voice and sits tall as he asks, "What can _I_ do that you can't?"

"Can you get the rest of my stuff?" she asks as she folds several pieces of clothing.

"There's more?" he asks with a laugh. "Where?"

"I don't know, around the suite somewhere," Rory answers distractedly, trying to fit two pair of heels into the bag. "The bag kind of exploded when I got here…" One of the shoes pops out of the bag and Rory glares at it.

Logan gets up and starts to head off to find the rest of Rory's things. "No wonder," he says as he goes, "It was packed so tight that clothes must have gone flying out as soon as you unzipped it!" Logan laughs, but Rory glares at him and throws a shoe at him as he leaves the room, nailing him with a heel in the back. "Ow!" He yelps. "I'm going!"

Rory empties out her suitcase on to the bed and starts to repack it…again. Logan's voice floats in from an adjacent room, "What exactly am I looking for, Ace?"

"Ummm, anything of mine," Rory answers, still focused on the suitcase.

"Like what, specifically?"

"Ummm," Rory looks up from her task and thinks. "Makeup, or shoes, or…my bathing suit!" She hits on something that she knows she's forgotten.

"Your bathing suit?" Logan asks, confused. "When did you wear a bathing- ohhh! Where could it have gotten to?"

Smiling, Rory answers, "Try near the Jacuzzi. Oh, and my black nightgown should be-"

"In the kitchen, of all places." Logan says with a sly smirk as he re-enters the room holding a bathing suit and a small black and red garment. "I wonder how it could've gotten there?"

"You know precisely how, Logan Huntsburger." She answers as she takes it from him and shoves it into her bag roughly.

"You didn't seem so angry about it then…" Logan counters as he lies back down on the bed.

Smiling, Rory shoves the bathing suit and a remaining shoe into her bag and triumphantly slams the lid shut. "Ha! I did it!"

"Never had a doubt in the world," Logan says as he reaches up past the bag for Rory's arm.

Holding Logan's hand and cocking her head towards the door, Rory says hurriedly, "Alright, come on."

"Nope," Logan says.

"Logan, it's time to go," Rory responds.

"Nope," he answers again. He gives her arm a gentle tug and pulls her down onto the bed with him. "It's time to stay." Rory smiles softly at him and kisses him sweetly. When she pulls away, he has his hands around her waist. He smiles back at her and softly says, "Don't go."

"I have to…"

"You could stay here with me…" Logan kisses her neck.

"No…" she says, trying hard not to get distracted. "I have to go this time." Logan continues kissing her, trying to be convincing. "It's not gonna work…" Rory is trying to stay focused.

"It worked on Flag Day. I managed to keep you here for a week." Logan smiles and continues kissing her shoulders.

"And I missed three classes and an assignment at the paper because of it!"

"Tell me it wasn't worth it," Logan doesn't even look up.

"Fall semester starts on Monday, Logan. I can't stay any longer…"

"One day won't hurt…"

"My mother is picking me up at the airport when I land in the morning. And if I recall, your _father_," Rory's distaste for Mitchum Huntsburger is evident in her tone, "Is coming in for an inspection tomorrow."

Logan backs away from Rory a bit and looks up at her. "I hate this." He says vehemently. She gives him an inquisitive look. "You leaving. My father running my life for me."

"I hate it, too," Rory stroke his cheek softly, "But it's better than the alternative."

"You staying here?" He asks hopefully.

"No, not seeing each other at all."

"But three months is such a long time."

"Yeah, it is." Rory tries not to sound too sad. "So I hope that you thoroughly enjoyed the time you had me here."

Smiling, Logan says, "Not thoroughly enough." He wraps his arms around her and leans her back, kissing her. She kisses him back and the kiss deepens as they wrap their arms around each other. Slowly, they stretch out and Logan's foot knocks the suitcase off of the bed and empties itself all over the floor.

"Damn it, Huntsburger," Rory manages to get out between kisses when she hears the thud.

"Quiet, Gilmore," Logan responds in a happy tone as he captures her lips again.

* * *

Lorelai and Rory are in the jeep driving through Star's Hollow in the middle of the day. Rory looks exhausted, but they are both chattering away and happy to see each other. "So you actually went _shopping_ in Herrod's?" Lorelai asks. 

"Yes, mom. Believe it or not, it is actually a store, not a museum."

"Wow. I don't think I'll ever get over just how well that Logan lives." Lorelai says with a mix of awe and admiration.

"It _is_ a good life," Rory agrees, stifling a yawn.

"So, what did he buy you?" Lorelai asks, slightly excited.

"Huh? Oh, a bracelet." Rory shows her mother the beads on her wrist.

Lorelai steals a peak without taking her eyes off the road for long. "Pretty!" She pauses a moment. "And what did you buy me?"

"Nothing," Rory answers.

"Nothing for Mommy?" Lorelai sounds injured.

"I bought you nothing, it's true." Rory answers as her mother shoots her a deadly glare. "Logan, however, sends his love." Rory reaches down into her bag and produces a small, glittery purse which she dangles in front of her mother's face.

Lorelai's eyes shine as she looks at it. "Ooooh! Very pretty! Such a good boy, that Logan. So much better than that ungrateful daughter of mine."

"Next time you see him, ask Mitchum if he'd be willing to trade."

"Next time I see Mitchum I'm gonna…" Lorelai brandishes a fist in the air as she turns the jeep into the Gilmore driveway.

Rory laughs appreciatively, but is interrupted by another yawn.

Lorelai parks the jeep and looks appraisingly at her exhausted daughter. "Well, it looks like you had a good visit. Rory nods in agreement as she opens her door. "Did you get any sleep at all while you were there?"

"Yes, I spent a great deal of time-"

Lorelai is out of the car now and interrupts Rory by saying, "If you finish that sentence with 'in bed' and a smirk, I swear I'm gonna…" Lorelai raises her first and starts to shake it at her daughter, when she sees that Rory is making the same motion her direction.

Laughing, Rory says, "You're violent tonight."

"You know," Lorelai answers as she walks towards Rory and the house, "A single woman has got to know how to protect herself in today's world."

"Yeah, well…" She yawns again.

"Come on my poor, tired jet-lagged girl." Lorelai puts her arm around Rory's shoulder and begins to lead her up towards the house. "Lets get you into bed."

"Mmmm…bed," Rory mumbles as she lets her mother lead her up the porch stairs. "That sounds nice."

* * *

The sun is setting over Star's Hollow and the Gilmore House. Rory is asleep in her room with the door shut. Lorelai is in the back yard with Paul Anka and a very large towel. She has evidently been bathing the dog, which had only served to anger him. A deflated kiddie pool with it's water spilled all over the yard is in one corner, and Lorelai is carefully trying to avoid the huge muddle that had been created. The typical music is playing softly in the background. 

"Paul Anka!" Lorelai calls, half whispering so as not to wake Rory or alert Babette to her predicament. "Paul Anka! Come back to me! I have your favorite towel! Come here and I promise never again to attack you with the mean, nasty hose!"

She runs for him, but he changes directions and Lorelai trips, and finds herself kneeling in the middle of the mud puddle with no dog and a very dirty towel.

"Paul Anka!"

We can hear a faint ringing in the house, and we cut to the living room where the phone is ringing. Sounds of Lorelai screaming "Paul Anka!" can still be heard and are quickly joined by Babette's voice asking, "What's wrong, sugar?"

The door to Rory's bedroom opens suddenly with a bang as it hits the wall behind it. Slowly, a dazed Rory emerges in her pajamas. Her hair is disheveled and her eyes are still half-closed and slightly glazed over. She is glaring at the offending telephone in the hallway as she slowly starts to make her way towards it. At the sound of one of her mother's screams, she turns her head to look out of the back door, but quickly turns her attention back to the living room to glower at the telephone. When she reaches the table she picks up the telephone and very groggily, and somewhat annoyed answers it. "Hello?"

"Hey," Chris' tone is easy and familiar.

"Hello?" Rory asks, still a little asleep and very groggy.

"Oh! Rory!" Chris realizes his mistake.

"Dad?" Rory is very confused, and she looks around the house as if to make sure that she's not dreaming.

"Hey kiddo! How was London? How is Logan doing?" Chris asks.

"London was fine. Logan is fine." Rory sounds upset now. "What do you want?"

Chris is taken aback by her change of tone, but answers, "Well, I was hoping to-"

But Rory cuts him off angrily. "You know what? I don't care. Don't call here again. If you want me, call my cell. If you want Mom, well, don't." Chris starts to answer but Rory quickly hangs up and violently slams the phone down on the table and then shuffles back towards her room. She stops briefly in the kitchen and looks out again at her mother chasing Paul Anka, shakes her head slowly and then re-enters her bedroom.

* * *

(commercial break)


	9. The Return

**A/N:** It has obviously been much too long since I have updated this. I'm sure that everyone will have lost interest in it. But as this is my first attempt at fanfiction, I feel compelled to continue it. I'm sorry for the delay, but hopefully I can get people interested in my story again.

* * *

Rory is asleep on the couch in the Gilmore house, a book open in her lap and her cell phone clutched in her hand. Paul Anka is curled up at her feet. Lorelai sneaks down the stairs, fully clothed and tip-toes over to her sleeping daughter. Leaning over her she whispers, "Rory." But she gets no response. Slightly louder she coos, "Rory," who shifts slightly in her sleep, but shows no signs of waking. Smiling sweetly at her daughter, Lorelai roughly jabs Rory in the arm and loudly says, "Rory!"

This time Rory jumps awake, sits up sharply and snaps, "What?" Seeing her mother standing there smiling guiltily, she glares at her. "What do you want, vile woman?"

"You can't possibly still be tired!" Lorelai exclaims, with some obvious excitement. "You've been asleep for like, 19 hours."

"I was up at 1 am, completely wide awake and just managed to get back to sleep about an hour ago," Rory whined.

"Jetlag's a bitch," Lorelai answers without sympathy.

"How eloquent," Rory responds with a grimace.

"But still true. Come on! Get up! It's time for breakfast."

"I can eat my pop-tart later!" Rory tries to cover her head with her arms.

"No pop-tarts. Pancakes!" Lorelai starts mercilessly poking Rory.

"Pancakes? How? Where? You're not…" Rory lets the question trail off as she swats at her mother's attacking hands.

Changing tactics, Lorelai tries to pull her daughter up off the couch by her arm. She is much more vivacious than either Lorelai Gilmore is wont to be on a weekend morning, and she tries to share her excitement with her daughter as she says, "Today is a very special day!"

Rory tries to look like she's moving without actually having to get up. She flails an arm and kicks her leg, she rolls around on the couch and ends up exactly where she started with her mother still trying to pull her up onto her feet. "What's so special about today?" she asks crabbily.

"Today marks a major step in my journey towards normalcy!" Lorelai announces with a flourish.

"And what a long, windy road it is," Rory quips.

Acknowledging the remark with a quick smirk, Lorelai continues on. "Today marks the three month anniversary of The Night I Took My Life Back," Lorelai says dramatically.

"Is that what we're calling it now?" Rory asks sarcastically, still hoping to get back to sleep.

"Got a better name for it?"

"The Night Luke Danes Lost The Best Thing He Ever Had?" Rory says hopefully.

"Too long. Get up!" The last is a whine, as Lorelai realizes that all of her, poking and prodding has not managed to budge Rory.

Rory begrudgingly gets up and pads her way towards her bedroom. She partially closes the door to her room while she changes and Lorelai sits at the kitchen table to wait for her. "How exactly do we celebrate this auspicious occasion?" Rory calls from behind the door.

"We eat pancakes," Lorelai answers.

"You don't make pancakes," Rory points out logically. "I also do not make pancakes."

"True, but I know where to find the best pancakes - and the best coffee - in the whole world." Lorelai nervously flips through a magazine as she waits.

"What?" Rory sticks her head out between the door and the frame as she brushes her hair. "You don't mean-"

"Yes, I do. Today, the Gilmores return to Luke's."

Rory's head disappears with a shake and she shouts, "Ummm…have we defined forever as three months?"

"Not exactly. But it's my life. I had such a good life. And now I am only attempting to get it back to normal as much as possible. I want to feel like Lorelai Gilmore again. I liked her." Lorelai says matter-of-factly, as if she was expecting this argument from her daughter.

"I did, too!" Rory yells. She emerges from her room fully dressed and looks directly at her mother before saying sincerely, "In fact, I still do."

Lorelai smiles.

"Even though she wakes me up at ungodly hours of the day and night," Rory's voice is sarcastic.

"The hour is perfectly godly on this side of the Atlantic," Loreali announces, standing and dragging Rory by the arm towards the front door.

Stopping in the hallway Rory tries to get a serious answer from her mother. "Mom, are you sure it's the right time for this?"

Lorelai turns to look at Rory and says lightly, "It's the prefect time. It's breakfast time!" Rory shoots her a disapproving look which causes Lorelai to put a more sober look on her face as she matter-of-factly states, "We live in a small town and I can't cook. Either I am going to starve or we're going to run into each other."

Rory sighs, but grabs her purse and heads towards the door. "You could _learn_ how to cook." Rory points out. Her mother gives her an incredulous look to which Rory responds, "Yeah, well, probably not."

"Learn to cook…" Lorelai mumbles and laughs to herself as she gathers her things and heads out the door, with Rory trailing behind her.

* * *

The Gilmore Girls are standing arm in arm in the town square outside of Luke's. Lorelai is trying to see inside the diner without looking directly at the storefront. Rory is nervously watching her mother and the restaurant. 

"Remind me why we're doing this again?" Lorelai asks nervously.

"A return to normalcy," Rory says, mimicking her mother's dramatic flair.

"Normal is boring. Who wants to be normal?"

"You wanted to reclaim your life," Rory tries again.

"Stagnation is the death of the soul," Lorelai answers without emotion, still staring at the diner.

"We're very dramatic this morning," Rory notes wryly.

"It's a dramatic moment. A milestone. An important step in an arduous journey." Lorelai regains some of her dramatic tone as she talks.

"Dramatic moments, milestones, steps and journeys. All require action. And here we are, standing in the square, motionless."

"Not entirely motionless. We're breathing. At least I am. And unless you've developed some very vampire-like qualities while you were in London, then you should be too." Lorelai rambles.

"Ah!" Rory throws up her hands. "I'm going home."

"What? Why?" Lorelai sounds genuinely shocked.

"You promised me pancakes," Rory whines.

"That doesn't sound like me."

"And coffee. You promised me coffee."

"Now _that_ sounds like me."

"You can't promise a girl – a jet-lagged girl- a GILMORE girl- coffee and then not deliver without facing the consequences." Rory states, but doesn't move towards their house.

The two stand there a moment longer and then Lorelai exhales deeply and asks, "Action, you say?"

"Precisely. Take back your life, girlfriend." Rory deadpans in response.

Nodding Lorelai takes the first steps towards the diner, and Rory hurrying to catch up. Without hesitating, Lorelai opens the diner's door and with a jingle enters her old haunt.

* * *

Lorelai stops walking just inside the door and surveys the diner, both of the girls looking for Luke and trying to gauge his reaction at their sudden appearance. But Luke is not to be seen. After a moment of confusion on Lorelai's part, she starts to walk again and heads over to one of the empty tables, which happens to be next to Miss Patty. As the girls sit down and make themselves comfortable, Patty looks up from her food to say in a hushed, shocked tone, "Lorelai?!" 

"Hey Patty," Lorelai answers in a cheerful tone, doing her best to feign normalcy.

"Hi Patty," Rory adds in.

"Rory, sweetheart, how are you?" Patty asks.

"I'm doing pretty well. London was great and-"

Miss Patty interrupts her. "That's great, honey. Is your Mom OK?"

Rory looks confused, and looks over at Lorelai to make sure that she's still there. Lorelai shrugs her shoulders slightly and Rory turns back to Patty. "Ummm…she's fine Patty. She's right-"

"Are you sure?"

"Am I…?" Rory quickly glances back at her mother again before answering, "Yeah, she's fine. Doesn't she look fine?"

"Yeah, don't I look fine?" Lorelai chimes in childishly.

"Of course she does," Patty says hurriedly to Rory. "Of course you do," Patty says soothingly to Lorelai and then quickly turns back to Rory. "Did she hit her head or something?" Patty asks, knowingly.

"No, I don't think so." Rory answers, still confused. She turns to her mother and asks, "Mom, Miss Patty wants to know if you hit your head on something."

"I love this game!" Lorelai says smiling and turns to the table behind her. "Reverend, Miss Patty wants to know if you hit your head on something."

The Reverend looks up from his soup and looks questioningly at Lorelai. She mouths to him, "It's a game," And he smiles in response.

The Reverend then turns to the rabbi, who is sitting with him and says, "Rabbi, Miss Patty wants to know if you hit your head on something."

The Rabbi turns around and taps Lulu on the shoulder and says, "Lulu, Miss Patty wants to know if you hit your head on something."

At that moment, Lane walks out from the storage room and squeals, "Rory! You're back!" As she runs over to the Gilmores' table to give Rory a hug.

Patty sees Lane and turns back towards her table, saying quietly to whoever was around to listen, "Inside information. No wonder she knew that Luke wasn't here." Lorelai's head jerks slightly towards Patty as she hears Luke's name, but chooses to focus on Lane instead.

"How was London?" Lane gushes at Rory.

"It was great. Hard to leave though…" Rory answers.

"Oh, I can't imagine. Leaving Logan there…having him so far away all the time. I think I would hate it." Lane says comfortingly.

"Well luckily you don't have to worry about that," Rory says, trying to change the subject my grabbing Lane's left hand.

"That's true," Lane says. "But you guys are lucky, too. Luke's gone for the morning, so you're safe."

Lorelai says, "Well, we're really not trying to avoid him," at the same time that Rory says, "Really? Damn." Both of them sound genuinely disappointed.

"Yeah," Lane answers Rory, not really hearing Lorelai. "I think he's out with April or something."

"I was promised pancakes," Rory says sullenly, sending a good-natured glare towards her mother.

"Well, Cesar's back there. And after he adds blueberries, you can hardly taste the difference between his and Luke's." Lane explains.

"Sold!" Rory says.

Lane turns to go when Lorelai stops her. "Lane," she says very seriously. "We were both promised coffee."

"I'm on it!" Lane answers cheerfully as she trots back to the counter.

As soon as Lane departs, Lorelai gets tapped on the shoulder by the Reverend. She turns to look at him, and he says, "Lorelai, Kirk says to tell Miss Patty that no, he did not hit his head on something."

* * *

The sun is fully up and there is life on the streets of Stars Hollow as the Gilmore Girls emerge from Luke's. They make it a few steps out the door before Lorelai stops and stretches a little bit. "I am _so_ full," she says with a slight smile. 

"Well you did eat-" Rory begins.

"I do _not_ want to hear the list. And since you kept pace with me the whole time..."

"You had that extra danish and at least-"

"And your breakfast came with all of that bacon and-"

"Agreed. We should never make a list of our food consumption. It'll ruin the whole experience for us."

"I'm so glad you came around," Lorelai said sweetly and began to walk across the Town Square towards home. After a minute of silence Lorelai asks with a rather mischevious grin, "How many cups of coffee did you have?"

"Five," Rory answers with a conspiratory giggle.

"Seven." Lorelai says, a hint of pride in her voice. "Jealous?"

"Of the queen? And risk flying too close to the sun?" Rory responds and links her arm with her mother as they continue to walk down the street. Another moment of silence passes, and Rory looks somewhat uncomfortably around the square as they walk. "Mom?" she finally ventures.

"Daughter?"

"Dad called."

Lorelai's eyes widen slightly and she tries her best to play it cool. "Oh, yeah?"

"Yesterday." Rory tries to search her mother's face for a clue. Finding nothing, she continues, "While you were out with Paul Anka."

"What did he say?" Lorelai asks, a hint of worry in her voice.

"Not much. Hello. Asked me how I was. He never got around to goodbye." Rory answers.

"Short conversation." Lorelai sounds relieved.

"Yeah," Rory agrees. Her voice sounds a little confused and she looks suspiciously out the corner of her eye at her mother as they cross the town square.

Catching the tone, Lorelai asks, "Nothing else? Not even a 'How's Yale?'"

"Umm," Rory considers. "He asked how London was and how Logan was doing. I just didn't feel like talking to him, and I told him so." Lorelai nods. "So the conversation didn't go much further."

"Honey, you know that you can talk to him. There's no reason why you two can't-"

A small cart with a brightly colored umbrella catches Lorelai's eye and she stops and stares as a man screams, "Snow cones! Get your snow cones here!"

"Come on!" Lorelai grins to Rory and starts in the direction of the cart.

Rory protests, "Too full!"

"Nonsense! It's just a snow cone!" Lorelai starts to walk faster.

"Mom! Remember the list!"

"It's just ice. It's practically a glass of water!" Lorelai answers, still smiling.

"And the sugar?" Rory asks.

"Is flavored!"

"And brightly colored?" Rory's tone of voice starts to change.

"And sticky!" Lorelai answers with a grin as Rory runs to catch up with her and they hurry towards the brightly colored stand.

"Ooooh! They have coffee-flavored ones!" Rory squeals.

"Two, please," Lorelai says, holding up two fingers.

"With two shots of syrup," Rory smiles and copies her mother's hand motion.

"Are you sure?" The snowcone-man asks. "It's pretty strong stuff."

"Yes we're sure. Damn the list!"

"Damn the list!" Rory echoes as the man goes to make them their treats.

(commercial break)


	10. Reading is Fundamental

**A/N: Well, I'm sure that no one is actually reading this anymore, as I've been so awful at updating. So if you're reading this despite my horrible tendancies, Thank You. I hope you enjoy it. And I will try to get on with the good stuff as soon as possible.**

* * *

It's a beautiful day in Stars Hollow. The sky is blue, the sun is bright, the birds are singing and the town is bustling with the energy of a Sunday afternoon. Townsfolk walk the streets chatting, eating ice cream and snow cones as they browse for that _perfect_ porcelain unicorn. The town troubador sings a cheerful song from a street corner. A couple is walking along the street happily as if there was nothing else in the world. They pass a stationary shop, pause a moment in front of a large sidewalk display of flowers and then continue ambling when they pass by the book store. From inside the store, a loud shriek disrupts their idyllic stroll and they turn their heads sharply at the interruption.

"Ahhhhhh! Andrew! You're being ridiculous!" Lorelai can be heard screaming. Her hands are gesticulating wildly and her eyes are fierce. Calmly, Rory appears at the door to the bookstore carrying a large – and very full – bag in both arms. She opens the door with some difficulty and stands in front of it, holding it open with a patient look of resignation on her face. She looks back into the store towards her mother.

"I am not being ridiculous, Lorelai!" Andrew screams in his peculiar monotone as he pulls a receipt from the cash register and places it on the counter in front of Lorelai. "Sign this," he orders.

"I will not!" Lorelai screams back. "This is a book store, Andrew!"

"Oh! So that's what all these heavy things are?" Andrew's voice is angry and heavily sarcastic as he takes several more volumes and places them in a shopping bag. "Sign." He points his chin towards the receipt.

"This is a book store and people are allowed to browse in a book store, Andrew. They're _supposed_ to browse in a book store." Lorelai is very loud and by this time a small crowd has gathered outside of the open store door.

"What's going on, sugar?" Babette squeaks to Rory. Rory sighs deeply in response and says quietly, "Just shopping with my mother."

"Browsing is fine, Lorelai," Andrew continues roughly. "I understand how to run my store. I also understand that I will never be able to sell _dirty, damaged_ books. So sign here!" Andrew slams a pen down on top of the receipt and crosses his arms over his chest.

Lorelai gives him a defiant look with raised eyebrows and then turns to her daughter and says, "I heard that, young lady. Don't say 'my mother' like I'm Emily!" And then she turns back to Andrew and screams, "I did not _damage_ any of your books, Andrew!"

Reaching into a shopping bag, Andrew pulls out a book and opens it. "Then what is this?" He asks, holding the offending page up for Lorelai to see.

"How am I supposed to know?" Lorelai responds.

"Because _you_ put it there!"

Out on the street, Lulu has appeared in the small crowd. Looking confusedly at Rory, she finds Babette and asks, "What's going on?" As Lorelai can be heard in the background screaming, "I most certainly did not."

Babette answers Lulu without turning away from the scene inside the store, "Well, Andrew's screaming and Lorelai's screaming so it must be…" she trails off as Andrew responds.

"It's brown and it's sticky...and it smells like coffee!" Andrew yells holding the damaged book up to his face.

"I wasn't drinking coffee today!" Loreali responds.

"Coffee flavored desserts, then. I saw you with them. Both of you!" he points accusingly at Rory.

"It does not smell like coffee!" Lorelai retorts with an insulted tone of voice. Andrew shoves the book into Lorelai's face, who then sniffs at the page. She huffs slightly in frustration and says, "You can't prove that it was us," she changes tactics and looks up at Andrew after smelling the book "No jury would convict us!"

Outside, Lulu looks back at Babette, "It must be what?"

Andrew closes the book in question and reads off of the cover, "The Big Book of Fuzzy Things."

Lorelai shakes her head and remains adamant. "Circumstantial evidence, at best."

"One-hundred-and-one Things to do with Glitter. Your Mother Doesn't Hate You: It Only Seems Like She Does. The Complete Unauthorized Biography of David Bowie." With each title, Andrew puts another book into the shopping bag.

"Fine!" Practically snarling, Lorelai grabs the pen from the counter, signs the receipt and grabs two enormous shopping bags from Andrew as she sweeps towards the door. Rory smiles apologetically and shrugs at Andrew as her mother passes and she follows, leaving the door to close behind her.

"Come on, Rory," Lorelai says as she exits.

"Thanks Andrew," Rory says as she follows her mother out of the store and into the waiting crowd.

Lorelai stops in her tracks when she sees the assembled townfolk outside the store. "What?" she asks angrily, daring someone to answer her. No one seems brave enough as they all shrink back from the angry woman.

"Snow cones," Babette whispers to Lulu, shaking her head. "Every year with those damn snow cones. Last year they wind up buying all the cat toys in Doose's."

"Snow cones?" Lulu asks excitedly. "Where?" Babette points vaguely over her shoulder towards the town square and Lulu's head whips around to find the colorful umbrella. Finding it, she runs off in the direction of the town square, arms flailing behind her and an enormous smile on her face.

Rory and Lorelai slowly walk away from the bookstore as the town disperses. Their movement is difficult and labored, as Rory's arms are straining around her large, heavy bag while Lorelai has two more, one in each hand. They have difficulty holding them, and every time Lorelai takes a step, the bags smack into her legs and tries to knock her off balance. They barely make their way back towards the town square before Rory's cell phone starts to ring. She stops and drops her bag with a solid "thud" on the sidewalk as she reaches into her purse to answer the phone. "Hello?" she asks, but all she hears is noise and something that sounds vaguely like music. Lorelai stops walking and comes to stand by her daughter. Rory tries again, "Hello?"

"Ro-o-ory!" Logan draws out her name and he sounds extremely happy that she answered.

"Logan?" Rory asks confused. At the same time, the handle on one of Lorelai's bags breaks, sending a pile of books across the sidewalk. Cursing under her breath, she drops the other bag and starts to gather her fallen books and put them back in the broken bag.

"S'me, Ace. Where are you?" Logan sounds a bit drunk.

"In Stars Hollow, Logan." Rory sounds a little annoyed. "Where are you?"

"Pub," Logan answers thickly. "Come out, have a pint with us! Wooo!" Logan screams, although not directly into the phone.

"I can't, Logan." He voice has a slight edge, but she sounds patronizing as if she were explaining to a young child. "I have school in the morning and it's an awfully long-"

"Wooo! Yes! Emma you can!" Logan yells again.

"I'm not Emma and no, I can't." She gets no response from Logan as the noise at the pub gets louder. "Logan?"

"You're Rory!" He finally answers. "Come out for a pint?" He asks again.

"I can't," Rory starts to explain again.

"Right. School." He answers her and then screams out to the pub, "She can't. She's still in school. Rory's just a student!"

"And I live in Connecticut," she added loudly, trying to clarify her reasons for staying at home. She looks hurt at Logan's words.

Suddenly, a strange voice with a thick English accent says into the phone, "Sorry love, gotta run!" The line goes dead.

Confused and a little angry, Rory looks at her phone for a moment and then down at her mother who is on her knees loading four books into the broken bag.

"Everything ok in London?" Lorelai asks from her position on the sidewalk.

"Yup, sounds like everything is swell in London," Rory answers curtly.

"Swell. Now that's a word you don't hear everyday," Lorelai says with a small smile. Rory tries to return the smile but is obviously still upset. Standing, Lorelai asks, "That happen often?"

"What happen often?" Rory asks, her irritation still evident in her tone.

"That." Lorelai gestures toward the phone with a book. "Logan. Beer. Girls."

Rory looks and sounds upset, and she tries to downplay the conversation. "No. And its not as bad as it sounded."

"Well I'd hope not, because it sounded pretty bad." Lorelai cut in as she put the last book back in its bag.

"No one sounds good when they're drunk," Rory's irritated.

"Logan Huntsburger: The drunk dialing boyfriend." Lorelai stands and cracks a smile.

Rory does not respond in kind. "He's allowed to have a drink, you know." Rory sounds defensive.

"I know," Lorelai says, slightly taken aback by her daughters tone. "I was just thinking about how hard this whole distance thing must be for you, and that it might help to have someone to vent to."

"I don't want to vent. I don't _need_ to vent. Nothing is wrong! OK?" Rory snaps.

"Rory..." Lorelai says in her best comforting, motherly voice. Rory looks her square in the face with a look that quite clearly says that the conversation is over. Lorelai gets it and quickly says, "Yeah, sure, fine. Whatever you say kiddo." Rory huffs, but doesn't say anything. Standing in the street with three large bags at their feet, Lorelai starts to feel a bit awkward and asks, "So...now what?"

Rory shakes her head quickly and then exhales slowly, calming herself. "Put those books in the other bags?" she suggests.

"They're already too full. They might break at any moment," Lorelai responds forlornly.

"Go back and ask Andrew for another bag?" Rory tries again.

"No way! I'm not going to get any help from _that_ man!" Lorelai shoots down the idea angrily.

"Leave them here and go get the jeep?"

"We just spent good money on all of this fine literature," Rory raises an eyebrow at her mother's choice of words, "and I am not going to have it stolen."

"Stolen? In Stars Hollow?" Rory asks incredulously. "Who here would want a damaged copy of Brain Surgery for Dummies anyway?"

"It's not damaged!" Lorelai stomps her foot.

"Well, we could…" Rory tries to think of another possible solution.

"I'm hungry. Do you think Luke is back yet?"

"I don't see the truck," Rory says as she looks around the square. "And how does that help us with the books?"

"It doesn't, but I want to go to Luke's." Lorelai answers.

"Then go," Rory sounds tired, and the annoyance is creeping back into her voice.

"But there's no point if Luke's not there." Lorelai whines a little.

"If you're hungry then Cesar can…"

"I'm not that hungry, I just want to see Luke," the whine is more pronounced.

Exhaustion, frustration and anger are evident in Rory's voice as she asks, "Why?"

Lorelai narrows her eyes at her daughter's tone and says, "Remember? The return to normalcy? Once again being able to eat cheeseburgers and get coffee and talk to Luke when I want-"

Rory cuts her off. "Why do you even want to talk to Luke so badly?"

"Rory?" Lorelai sounds hurt. "What are you…"

"I mean, you have Dad. And you can get coffee at Weston's. What do you need with both of them?" Rory continues as if Lorelai hadn't spoken.

"Ok, what is wrong with you? What are you talking about?"

Rory rolls her eyes and says pointedly, "I know, Mom."

"You know what?" Lorelai is nervous and confused.

"I know that you're dating Dad. I mean, it's never worked out before, but if you _think_ that's what you want now…fine. But I just don't see why you have to drag Luke into it. Just leave him alone."

"I am NOT dating Christopher!" Lorelai responds loudly in a rather hurt tone. "I haven't seen him in three months!"

"Yeah, right. How'd he know I was in London then?"

"What?"

"When he called, last night, he asked how my trip to London was. I certainly didn't tell him about it!" Rory spits out accusingly.

"Well, I –I told him about that." Lorelai gets out in a subdued tone.

"I though you hadn't seen him in three months?" Rory looks triumphant but sounds angry.

"I haven't!" Lorelai insists. "But I've talked to him…on the phone..."

"Of course. And you just happened to tell him all about Logan and my trip during that one conversation."

"You're his kid." Lorelai is getting angry now, too. "It's an easy conversation topic."

"I guess I should be glad that you two find time to do any talking at all with all of the crazy monkey-"

"That's enough!" Lorelai cuts off Rory's tirade. "There is no crazy monkey anything! We talk on the phone...regularly." She barely manages to add the last word in the spirit of honesty. "He didn't do anything wrong, Rory. There's no reason why I shouldn't talk to him."

"He jumped into bed with you the minute he saw the chance!" Rory spat back.

"It's nice to have a friendly person to talk to sometimes," Lorelai says with a sadness in her voice. "Just to talk."

But Rory doesn't notice the sadness and in her frustration screams, "Sure. Right. Because that's what you two always do. Talk."

"Nothing is going on with Christopher, Rory." Lorelai tries to explain again.

"And all this time I've been watching out for you, worried about you, making sure I was in Connecticut all summer thinking that you were all depressed." Rory is angry and Lorelai gives her a hurt look. "But you're fine. You're better than fine. You've got Dad back again. At least for now. You don't need me here. I could have been in London instead of leaving Logan there with Emma!"

"Who's Emma?" Lorelai asks.

"I don't know!" Rory screams, exasperated and upset.

Lorelai hates to see her daughter so upset and switches back into MOM mode as she soothingly says, "Aw, Rory, I'm sure it's nothing."

"No! We're not talking about that. I'm not talking about it!" Rory interrupts without even listening. "It doesn't matter now, nothing can be done about it anyway. I really do wish you would make up your mind, though. It's getting really hard to keep track. But don't expect me to keep trying. You're on your own, next time!"

Lorelai inhales sharply, clearly hurt. Angry and holding back tears, Rory turns and stomps away towards the house, leaving a shocked and saddened Lorelai standing in the town square surrounded by three large bags full of books. "Rory!" she screams as she walks away. "What am I supposed to do now?" She screams as she surveys the three mountainous bags at her feet.

(commercial break)


	11. If at first you don't Succeed

**AN: A big thank-you to everyone who is still reading, and a double thank-you to everyone who left reviews. I can really feel the Chris-hatred boiling over and know that I am with you in spirit, if not always in writing. And while I think that you guys might like the direction of this chapter, keep in mind that this is still only the second "episode" of my season 7, and getting rid of a parasite like Christopher Hayden takes a little bit of time. (Much like getting over the flu or laringitis.) **

**Fridaynightdinner: What is "ff" and how did you hear about my little story? (I'm new to the whole realm of fanfiction...)**

**Read, review and enjoy the extra long chapter to make up for the short one from last time.**

* * *

The sun is still shining in Stars Hollow as Lorelai slowly makes her way to her front door. She is dragging the decked out red wagon that Babette and Morey use to 'walk' their Apricot around town. The weight of dozens of heavy books is causing the wagon wheels to sink into the lawn, making the ride extremely bumpy. Each jostle causes the precariously packed collection of books to shift and wobble. Every time the wagon stops, Lorelai has to stop and pull the wagon free of the dirt before it will start to move again. After one particularly vigorous tug, two books slip off the top of the pile and land on the lawn. Sighing, Lorelai stoops to pick up the books and then, holding the books with one hand, continues to drag the heavy wagon across her lawn with the other hand. She is steps from her porch and the end of her trek when her cell phone starts to ring.

With an enormous tug, she gets the wagon moving again and covers the remaining distance to the front porch without losing any more books. Dropping the wagon handle as she gains the porch, she reaches into her purse. As she fishes around for the noisy phone she grumbles in a fakely sweet, high-pitched voice, "Why, yes mother. You were right. I should have put in a path up to the front door. I am lazy and inconsiderate and yet again it has come back to bite me in the – aha!!"

As she pulls the still-ringing phone out of her purse she plops down on the stairs, the loaded wagon forgotten near her feet. Flipping open the phone she says, "Hello?"

"Hey, Lor." Christopher's voice can be heard.

"Hey," she sighs heavily at the sound of his voice.

"Hey?" he mocks her tone. "What's wrong? You sound exhausted…"

"And relieved, too," she adds on.

"Relieved?"

"Very relieved," she confirms.

"Ok, why are you exhausted?"

"Because I just dragged 40 books across my front yard in a wagon."

Not expecting that answer, Christopher manages to only miss a single beat as he nods once and continues, "I didn't know you had a wagon."

"I don't."

"Then how -?"

"Babette has a wagon."

"You stole Babette's wagon?"

"No!" Lorelai quickly responds. "I borrowed it."

"Much more civilized," Chris nods approvingly. "Why are you relieved?"

"Because _you_ are not my mother."

"I should have known that was the reason."

"Yes, you should have," Lorelai agrees good-naturedly.

"Well, I'll tell you something," Chris says in a conspiratory whisper.

"What's that?" Lorelai sounds intrigued.

"I am also relieved that I'm not your mother. It makes me smile a little bit every day, in fact." Lorelai giggles a little bit at the response. "It'd make that whole Rory situation _really_ hard to explain."

Squinting her eyes, Lorelai says, "Really bad visual. New subject."

"Ummm…." Chris doesn't have one.

"Well, what'd you call for?" Lorelai asks, trying to help him out.

"What do you mean?" Chris asks. "I call you every night."

"Exactly, you call me every _night_." She emphasizes the last word. "This is day. You never call me during the day."

"What? Is your daytime boyfriend going to get jealous that I'm moving in on his time?" Chris asks facetiously.

"I don't have a boyfriend," Lorelai answers simply and quietly.

Chris doesn't respond, noting the omitted words that might have confirmed their relationship status. He looks genuinely sad, but not surprised.

To end the slightly awkward silence, Lorelai prods Chris with, "So…?"

Giving himself a mental shake, Chris restarts the conversation. "So…right. I talked to Rory last night. Briefly."

"I've heard. How briefly?" she tries to sound nonchalant.

"Very briefly. She sounded tired, and, uh, angry." Christopher stuttered out the truth.

"Angry?"

"Yeah. Wring my neck, kick me in the teeth, Sienna Miller meets the nanny kind of angry." When Lorelai doesn't respond, Christopher continues. "She was angry that I was calling. Angry, like, uh, she doesn't know what's going on." Christopher finished lamely.

"Nothing's going on." Lorelai answers calmly.

"Nothing, huh?" Christopher reacts with some vehemence and the quickly reverts to his pleasant tone. "I know that nothing has happened yet, but we've been-"

"Nothing is going on that she needs to know about. Who I talk to on the phone should not concern her." Lorelai tries to explain without offending Christopher.

"That's who I am? Someone you talk to on the phone?" Christopher spits out.

"No," Lorelai tries to be cute to save the conversation. "You're Christopher."

"You tell Rory everything," Chris responds, ignoring her attempt.

"There's nothing to tell. I haven't seen you in three months. What? You want me to give her a daily log of my phone calls?" Lorelai sounds irritated now, too.

Christopher ignores the question and poses one of his own, "Why doesn't she know, Lorelai?"

"Because I haven't told her, Christopher," She copies his lecturing tone of voice.

"Because you're ashamed. You don't want to tell her. And I can't understand why you wouldn't want to tell your kid that you're dating her father! It would make most kids happy."

"Rory's not most kids. You're not most fathers."

"You can't still be mad about that-"

"I could if I wanted to!" Lorelai all but screams at him. "You'd have earned it. But that's not really the point!" Lorelai waits for a response, but Chris stays sullen and silent. When he doesn't answer, Lorelai says in a calmer voice, "Iit's not exactly life-altering news, Chris. 'Rory, I talk to your father on the phone sometimes!' How will that little bit of knowledge change her life?"

"Every night, Lorelai."

"Fine! We talk on the phone every night about nothing-"

"For hours…" Chris interjects.

"We ramble together. That's not exactly dating, is it?"

"No, I suppose it's not. You won't come up to Boston, and I'm not_ allowed_ to come down to Star's Hollow. You won't tell Rory, you get shifty and distant every time I bring up the vague possibility of the two of us every being more to each other than phone buddies. Hell, you probably spend your days with Rory discussing what circle of hell I'm mostly likely to end up in!"

"We don't talk about you, Chris!"

"No, you don't. But I'm not a 1-900 number just waiting around to talk to you, ya know! Here for your comfort when you're lonely or you miss _him_!"

Lorelai looks genuinely surprised at the near-mention of Luke and the acid in Christopher's voice when he said it. "I never said you were…"

"I'm not just a random guy, I'm Rory's father-"

"Don't drag Rory into this. She has nothing to do with this!"

"Exactly, she's only involved in the important relationships in your life. And this obviously isn't one of them. I'll tell you what. I'll stop pestering you with my annoying, rambling phone calls. You can have I nice quiet night…hell, you can have a nice quiet life, for all I care."

With the last, bitterly violent word the line went dead and Lorelai stared at the phone in disbelief. She jumps when it starts to ring again and opens it quickly to say, "Hello?"

She closes her eyes and exhales a long breath while the other end speaks. "Hi, Mom. Yeah, Rory's still a little jet lagged but she got home fine," she answers in an exhausted voice.

She leans back against the stairs as the conversation continues and tries to prop her feet up on the wagon. As soon as her foot hits the topmost book, the wagon gives a terrifying shudder and collapses completely, leaving Lorelai without a footrest and an unbelieving look on her face.

* * *

The sun is setting as evening falls over Star's Hollow like a soft, cuddly blanket. As Lane and Rory walk down the street, the streetlights begin to twinkle as the town descends into twilight. The girls are in the middle of a conversation and Rory is busy explaining the scene with her mother from earlier that day. "And she just kept asking what was wrong, like she automatically assumed that he was doing something wrong just because he's _Logan._ And then I blurted out that thing about Dad and stormed off." Lane gives her best friend a sympathetic glance. "And I just left her standing there with all those books," Rory finishes softly. 

"Well, if you trust him, she has to trust him, right? So, do you trust him?" Lane asks.

"Absolutely not," Rory answers without hesitation. Lane looks utterly shocked and confused and Rory tries to explain her reasoning. "That man has proven repeatedly that he is unable to let her be happy. He insists on butting in when he isn't needed or wanted and he has no scruples when it comes to dealing with her."

With a small smile Lane shakes her head and explains, "Not your Dad, Rory. I was talking about Logan. Remember him?"

Rory looks a little sheepish as she says, "Oh, right. Well, I…" She struggles to pull her thoughts back onto the appropriate course. "Of course I trust Logan. I absolutely trust Logan."

Lane nods her approval. "Then there shouldn't be a problem..."

"I just really don't trust _Emma_," Rory tacks on, putting as much derision into the name as she can muster.

"I can understand that," Lane answers with a little laugh. "Those British fllozies are always trying to steal our American men." The girls have reached the town square by this time and are standing idly (or loitering shiftily, Taylor would say) behind the gazebo. "But he loves you Rory, and a couple of 'pints at the pub'," Lane's English accent on the last four words is truly awful, "Isn't going to change that."

"I know, I know. It's just so hard sometimes and I wish…" Rory trails off as her eyes are drawn to the other side of the Square. Lorelai is making her way – haltingly – towards the diner. Every few steps forwards results in a long pause while Lorelai tries to mentally - and physically - prod herself forward without drawing attention to herself. She is so engrossed in her internal struggle that she doesn't see either Rory or Lane as she walks forward a few steps at a time.

"You wish that what?" Lane asks, confused, not having seen Lorelai.

When Rory whips her head back around, she is wearing a look that clearly indicates that she didn't hear or understand Lane's question. Not bothering to answer, she gives her friend a large hug and says happily, "I've gotta run. We're returning to normalcy tonight!"

Rory releases Lane and takes off at full speed to the other side of the Square where Lorelai has frozen in front of the diner, with a determined and somewhat dejected look on her face. Rory runs up from behind and slips her arm through her mother's. "Three, two, one…action." Rory says quietly.

"I don't see his truck," Lorelai says sadly, taking her daughter's sudden appearance in stride without so much as a glance, although her face does brighten slightly.

"I'm sure it's parked out back."

"Do you think he's there this time?"

"There's only one way to find out," Rory's voice is encouraging and supportive.

"But I…"

"I know. But our coffee is in there." Lorelai shoots her daughter a quick look. "But you have to go inside to get it," Rory finishes.

"Well, why didn't you say so?" Lorelai starts to walk forward. Arm in arm, the Gilmore girls enter the diner.

jingle jingle

The door greets them as they walk into the diner which is fairl busy at the end of the evening rush. Customers are eating, talking and drinking happily but neither Luke nor Desar are visible. The girls walk towards an empty table by the door. Lorelai moves to sit down in the closest chair which faces the window, then changes her mind and sits in the chair directly facing the counter. Shaking her head after a second, she gets up, walks in a complete circle around the table then with a slight cry of frustration sits stiffly with her back facing the counter, staring directly out the window. Rory follows the whole performance with a smile in her eyes and waits a second to make sure that her mother has made her final selection before sitting in the seat directly opposite her. Rory has a good view of the counter, but does her best not to stare as she searches for a sign of Luke. They sit quietly for half a moment, Lorelai seems to be barely breathing and Rory looks concerned for her mother's wellbeing.

With a sharp intake of breath Lorelai shakes her head slightly and moves as if to stand again. At the sound of a deep voice booming from behind the storeroom curtain, she immediately sits back down and tries to look as if she had never thought of leaving. "All right, I found one more jar of low-fat mayo, Kirk, but if I ever catch you trying to sneak back there again I'll snap your neck like the twig that it is." Luke slams the Costco-size jar of mayonnaise on the counter in front of Kirk and then disappears into the kitchen.

The Gilmores sit quietly for another quick moment as Lorelai starts to breathe again. "This feels staged," Rory whispers to her mother as they both stare at each other nervously. "It must look staged."

"It _is_ staged," Lorelai whispers back.

"All of the whispering probably isn't helping," Rory responds with a smirk.

"Then act normal," Lorelai orders in a hiss.

Rory raises her eyebrows as she sees Luke emerge from the kitchen and hand Kirk a very small knife. "Well," she starts, "I'm sorry about leaving you alone with all those books and a broken shopping bag this afternoon."

This comment seems to ground Lorelai a little bit and she starts speaking as the panic-stricken look leaves her face. "And which do you feel worse about deserting, your mother or the books?" Lorelai asked with a hint of amusement in her voice.

At the counter, Kirk is struggling with the lid to the mayonnaise jar and he making the most horrific set of noises as he wrestles with it. Frustrated and angry, Luke takes the jar and pops the top off easily before handing it back to Kirk and continuing to refill glasses at the counter.

"That's not fair!" Rory whines. "There were some really interesting books in there that you never would have let me get if we weren't forced into it by Andrew."

"Yeah, you manage to swing that every year on snow cone day. If I didn't know you better…" Lorelai's voice is suspicious and teasing.

"Why mother, I'm insulted! A lady never _purposefully_ drips her snow cone on the Short Stories of Mark Twain."

"_This_ lady could certainly never be accused of that. You on the other hand, might not be a lady." Lorelai says accusingly.

"I'm a lady! I can swoon," Rory replies animatedly.

"Swoon?" Lorelai laughs at the funny-sounding word.

"Swoon," Rory says as she demonstrates by draping her arm dramatically over her face.

At this point, Luke notices Rory at the table, and immediately his face breaks into a smile. A few seconds later, he realizes that Lorelai is in the seat across from her and just as suddenly he is wearing a very serious face that is dangerously close to a scowl. He stares at the table for a minute, oblivious to the customer to his left talking to him. Rory sees him staring and tries to smile at him slightly. He shakes his head as if to clear it.

"Excuse me, sir. When do you think I'll be able to get some wheat toast?" The unknown customer asks impatiently.

"Three months," Luke whispers. "Forever. Same thing, I guess."

"That's a long time for toast," the customer responds, surprised.

Looking at him, Luke turns around to the toaster, and places a plate in front of the man saying, "Nah, it's really not that long at all."

Seeing Luke actually move towards his order pad and begin to make his way across the restaurant, Rory tries to continue the flow of their "un-staged" conversation. "So how _did_ you get them all home?" she asks.

"Apricot's wagon." Lorelai states and Rory nods in response. "Actually, we owe Babette and Morey a wagon."

"What happened to the wagon?" Rory asks.

"Remember the shopping bag?" Lorelai asks. "And all the books?"

"Right," Rory nods. "Does it have to have the little house on it? That might be harder to find."

"I guess it should. But I don't really know how to build a house for a cat."

"You don't really know how to build anything," Rory responds.

"Neither do you!" Loreali answers defensively.

"I helped build a house once!"

"Helped," Lorelai points out. "Do you think that you remember enough to..."

"No way," Rory doesn't even let her mother finish the thought. "I don't know how to build anything."

"How about a tent? Could we buy a very small tent and hot glue it to the wagon?"

"Do they sell very small tents?" Rory asks.

"Ohh! And we could make it pretty!" Lorelai exclaims, but all further conversation is interrupted as a flannel arm reaches between them and places two large coffee cups on the table in front of them. They look up, but Luke doesn't look at them, as he is focusing on the coffee that he's already pouring. His face looks somehow wrong, as if he's forcing himself not to show any expression at all. Even for the monotone Luke, it doesn't seem to fit his face.

"Hey Luke," the Gilmores say in unison. Lorelai's voice is quiet and apprehensive while Rory sounds genuinely glad to see Luke.

Luke seems to only hear the latter. "Hey Rory," He also sounds genuinely glad to see her. "How are you? Lane said you were in England last week or something…?"

"Yeah, Logan is in London this year, so I went for a visit before I have to go back to school."

"So school hasn't started back up yet?"

"Nope, classes start on Monday, but I'll be heading back to New Haven tomorrow."

"And I'll be all alone again," Lorelai adds in, trying to sound cool about it, and not wanting to be left entirely out of the conversation.

"You haven't gotten used to it yet?" Rory asks.

"No, and I never will!" Lorelai insists.

"Well, once Rory's all done I guess you'll have to get used to it. Any idea what you'll be doing after graduation?" Luke is determinedly looking only at Rory.

"Oh, I'm trying not to think about graduation. Yale is my safe place - my blanky - and I don't want to think about having to leave and go out into the big, cold world," Rory laments.

"Oh, it's not so bad, hon," Lorelai soothes.

"Easy for you to say, you had me with you the whole time." Rory teases.

"Right, I forgot! Getting pregnant at 16 was the easy way out! That must explain why my parents were always so disappointed in me."

"Well, now that we've figured that out, I guess you can stop going to therapy," Rory smiles.

"No, no, you should probably still keep going," Luke interjects in a deadpan. Lorelai looks up at him confused; she can't tell whether or not he was joking. Luke shifts his feet uncomfortably and then raises his pencil and asks, "You know what you want?"

Rory recovers first. "Cheeseburgers and fries, please."

"Ooohh…and a donut with sprinkles." Lorelai adds and Rory nods in agreement, her eyes wide with anticipation.

"What?" Luke asks.

"Donut. Frosted. With sprinkles." Lorelai makes ridiculous hand gestures to describe each element of the requested treat.

Luke rolls his eyes slightly and then starts to turn away. He stops himself and turns back to the table, asking, "Do you each want one of these horribly over-sugared, _breakfast_ pastries at 7:30 in the evening, or will one be enough?"

Lorelai looks at Rory and Rory looks back, uncertainty written on both their faces. Then suddenly Rory hits on the solution, "Bring one as an appetizer and one as dessert."

"Ooohh, a symmetrical meal. I love it!" Lorelai bounces a little in her chair.

Staring at the two of them, Luke says sadly, "I have no words."

"So long as you have donuts," Lorelai quipped back happily, "then we're good."

* * *

In the diner Rory and Lorelai are talking contendly over the remnants of their meal. Two destroyed cheeseburger plates (with only the lettuce and a few straggling fries remaining) have been pushed to the side and two small pieces of a very pink donut are left on a small plate between them. The diner is almost empty, just the Gilmores and another couple eating quietly in the far corner. Luke is nowhere to be seen. 

Lorelai grabs one of the bits and eats it. Then she points at the last remaining bite and says in her best mother voice, "Rory, you've got to finish your donut."

"No I don't." Rory answers an offended Lorelai. "Besides, This one's yours. My donut was the appetizer."

"How can you tell?"

"This one was pink," Rory states simply.

Lorelai shrugs and can't come up with a viable argument. She grabs the last bite of donut and pops it in her mouth quite happily. "Done!" She looks around the diner quickly, and then asks in a whisper, "Where's Luke?"

"I dunno," Rory says, also looking around. "I haven't seen him since he brought your donut."

"Well how are we supposed to pay? Or maybe we're not supposed to pay?" Lorelai obviously likes the idea of the second possibility.

"Then why did he leave us this?" Rory asks, picking up a check from the table.

"So that we knew the value of what we were getting," Lorelai answered sagely.

"Mom…" Rory warned.

"Money, I got it. Don't worry." She pulled cash out of her purse and left it on the table as the girls started to get up and gather their things. "That was almost normal," she said surveying the almost empty diner with satisfaction.

"Almost," Rory agrees.

"Not quite," Lorelai is more talking to herself than anyone else. "The conversation was a little off, and there was an awkward silence or two…"

"But the burgers were right on target," Rory adds in.

"And a good burger can make up for a lot," Lorelai agrees.

"And the coffee… I wouldn't worry," Rory says quietly. "It just needs some time."

"Exactly. It wasn't completely awful…could've been a lot worse." Lorelai grabs one last French fry from their table and drops it in her mouth before turning towards the door and saying with a smile, "Still beats Friday night dinner with the Gilmores."

Rory shakes her head as she opens the diner door.

As the jingle of the door announces their departure, the camera does not follow them, but instead pans across the diner. We see dirty tables piled with dishes, the mostly empty coffee pot behind the counter and there, sitting on the floor behind the counter is Luke. His back is leaning against the counter and his mangled baseball cap is balled up in his fists. He's staring blankly, barely blinking, at the spot on the wall in front of him, where he can just make out an order for three hammers, a phillips-head screwdriver and three boxes of nails in assorted sizes written in his father's hurried scrawl. Even the door shutting doesn't cause him to look away from that spot and he sits, staring, unaware, not even noticing the motion of his own hands.

(commercial break)

* * *

**So, whatcha think? Realistic? I promise a quick update (that you will all hate) by next week to end episode 2 so that we can move on to the next set of events. **


	12. If I Only Had a Brain

**AN: **Due entirely to the efforts of **melin1977**, I am pleased to present the end of episode 2. However, I feel I must apologize to him or her, because this update negates the thing that you were so happy about from the last chapter. I suppose that I should probably apologize to the rest of you as well, because I imagine that this story appears not to be getting Java Junkie fast enough for anyone. But I promise, it will get there.

**fridaynightdinner** and **MoonlightGardenias**: Luke is...well...sad. And surprised that he's sad. He doesn't particularly care for dealing with his own emotions, and I think during the three month hiatus without Lorelai around, he was able to ignore a lot of his own thoughts and focus on other things. But she shows up (and doing her best to be the normal, vivacious Lorelai we all know and love) and he hasn't dealt with _anything._ He hasn't cried (obviously). It's all still quite raw for him. And he has no idea what to do about it.

As for where the story is going and when it will get there...keep reading!!! (And reviewing...because obvisouly, it works.)

* * *

The only thing showing any sign of life in the Gilmore living room is the television, which is playing the credits of some unknown classic to a dark room. As we pan out from the television, we can see the light from the screening flashing on partially emptied packages of candy and a bowl of popcorn, discarded on the coffee table. Rory and Lorelai are asleep on opposite ends of the couch, each covered partially by a thin blanket. Rory's dark hair is spotted with several kernels of popcorn that look vaguely as if they had come from Lorelai's general direction. The scene is peaceful as they girls breathe heavily, Lorelai practically snoring.

The eerie calm of the night is shattered suddenly as a tinny version of Joan Jett's "I Love Rock and Roll" erupts into the darkness. Both Gilmores start at the noise and sit up sharply. Lorelai looks around the dark living room in utter confusion, her eyes blurry. Rory looks slightly less confused as she reaches to the end table behind her and grabs at her cell phone. She holds the phone up to her ear and inadvertently crushes a popcorn kernel that had gotten stuck in her hair with it. The crunch confuses her as she brushes her hair with her free hand and answers her phone, "Hello?" She shoots her mother a dirty look, flicks one of the remaining popcorn kernels at her and starts to stand up. "Hey," her voice sounds happy. We can't hear Logan's half of the conversation, but as Rory pads her way towards her bedroom we can hear her say, "Yeah. Movie night. A musical extravaganza. Mary Martin as Peter Pan. Newsies and at least half of the Wizard of Oz." While Logan answers, Rory turns and waves a sleepy hand goodnight to her mother who smiles and returns the gesture.

Lorelai smiles as Rory closes the door to her bedroom and her voice is muted. Sitting straight up, she blinks at the darkness as the credits on the television end and the DVD returns to the main menu showing a cheerful image of Dorothy, Toto and their companions, "We're off to see the Wizard!" playing in the background. Slowly, Lorelai stands and turns off the television on her way up the stairs.

Entering her room in the dark, Lorelai sighs as she stares at her bed, littered with discarded items from the day. She carefully steps over an upended laundry basket and begins to empty her bed of the stray items. Suddenly she hears a small creak and her head whips around into a dark corner by the window, her eyes wide and face pale. She holds in place, motionless for a long moment and then, not completely certain that nothing is there, she begins to breath again and continues her haphazard cleaning at a slightly faster pace. After placing the last sweater on a chair, she wriggles out of her jeans and climbs under the quilt in just her T-shirt. She exhales deeply as she sinks into the mattress and pillow, but doesn't close her eyes. She studiously ignores the dark corner by the window, but casts an occasional look at the clock on her bedside table which continues to read "2:13" in bright red numerals. She places her arms stiffly at her side, as if she is forcing them to remain still. Finally, after what must have seemed like minutes to her, but in reality was only 15 seconds, she sits up and reaches for the phone.

Her call is answered on the second ring. "Hello?" Christopher's voice doesn't sound tired or even angry.

Lorelai pauses a minute before speaking, but she knows that hanging up wouldn't do her any good. His caller ID would still identify her. "Hi," she says, trying – and almost succeeding - to sound normal.

Chris smiles, and returns the greeting. "Hi."

"I'm sorry if I woke you," Lorelai says.

"I wasn't asleep. I couldn't…I'm not tired." Chris finishes a little shiftily.

Lorelai doesn't press the issue. "You know, Chris, I didn't really-"

Christopher cuts her off genially and changes the subject, "What are you still doing up?"

Lorelai relaxes visibly at Chris' decision to ignore that afternoon's conversation and curls up into a ball to continue talking. "It's Saturday night," she says. "All the cool people stay up late on Saturdays."

"Well, obviously," Chris agrees as Lorelai lets out a mammoth yawn. Laughing slightly, he asks, "Good movie night?"

"It was a musical extravaganza," Lorelai corrects him.

"Well, obviously," Chris repeats in the same tone. "_This is Spinal Tap? _The Who's _Tommy_? _Sister Act II_?"

"_Sister Act II_?" Lorelai asks incredulously with a shake of her head.

"Whoopi Goldberg…singing nuns…" Chris tries to explain.

"I know the movie," Lorelai interrupts. "But why would you suggest _Sister Act II_? Was _Sister Act I_ not enough of a reference for you?"

"Ya know, I don't think they called it _Sister Act I_." Chris answers calmly, which only serves to irritate Lorelai further.

"What?"

"I think they just called it _Sister Act_. Because at the time they didn't know that it was going to become a monster-sized hit that required sequels. Calling it _Sister Act I_ would have just seemed presumptuous."

"Have you ever seen _Sister Act_?" Lorelai asks, derision in her tone.

"Which one? One or two?"

"Two."

"Definitely not," Chris answers immediately.

"One?" Lorelai asks.

"Nope."

"Then how do you know so much about the movies?" Lorelai asks suspiciously.

"I don't."

"You knew about the singing nuns. And Whoopi!" Lorelai responds triumphantly.

"Lucky guesses."

"No way. I bet you and Gigi sit around all the time and watch _Sister Act_."

"Gigi wouldn't know Whoopi Goldberg from Kiera Knightley," Chris responds and then asks, "So what classic masterpieces were on _your_ agenda this evening?"

Allowing the change in subject, Lorelai answers, "Peter Pan."

"Which version?"

"Live action starring Mary Martin," Lorelai answers.

"An excellent example of the benefits of cross-dressing. And…?"

"Newsies."

"I don't know that one…"

"Christian Bale before he was Batman. Ann-Margaret as a burlesque dancer. Joseph Pulitzer. Urban cowboys. Organized labor. It's good stuff." Lorelai explains, happily.

"I'll take your word on it," Chris responds. "Anything else?"

"Well," Lorelai starts a little guiltily, "We started _The Wizard of Oz._"

"Lorelai!" Chris throws his free hand into the air, clearly distressed. "What'd you do that for?"

"It's a great musical!" Lorelai defends herself. "And Rory was here and I'm a lot older than I used to be…"

"But no better able to distinguish fantasy from reality." Chris interjects.

"I'm a grown woman with a grown daughter!" Lorelai exclaims.

"Who is terrified of _Wizard of Oz,_" Christopher finishes for her.

"I am _not_ terrified of a children's movie!" Lorelai insists.

"You once ran screaming from your parents' dining room because you were served a poppy seed bagel for breakfast." Chris states.

"I don't like _poppy_ seeds. They get caught in your teeth." Lorelai stammers out an excuse, but doesn't sound convincing.

"That was no reason to throw the bagel at the maid," Chris counters.

"No, that was just funny," Lorelai lets out a little evil laugh.

"Or that time you made me come over to your house to make sure there were no flying monkeys on the terrace?"

"I was nine!" Lorelai defends.

"You were fifteen!" Christopher counters.

"Then maybe I just wanted you to come over," Lorelai's voice was a little flirty.

"You locked yourself in the bathroom, crying, until I had gotten rid of them all!" Chris was on a roll, now. "And what about that Halloween when you stopped giving out candy because some kid came trick-or-treating as the Wicked Witch of the West?"

"I left the bowl on the porch! All of the kids got plenty of candy!" Lorelai sounds slightly desperate.

Sighing, Chris asks, "Well, what is it this time? Axes? Lions? Tornados?"

"Those are all perfectly reasonable things to be afraid of. If I were afraid of them. Which I'm not." She sounds more like she is trying to convince herself than anyone else.

"Then what? The color yellow?"

"Nothing, Chris. I'm fine. I am 38 years old and I am awake late on a Saturday night **only** because I fell asleep in front of the television after a long and wonderful movie night with my daughter. And for no other reason."

"You're sure?" Chris asks.

"Of course I'm sure."

Christopher yawns in response. "Well, if you're sure, I think it's time for this cool guy to get to sleep."

"I thought you weren't tired?"

"Well, obviously, I am now. Congratulations, you have worn me out."

"Haha!" Lorelai says triumphantly.

"I'm not entirely sure that's a compliment," Chris responds matter-of-factly.

"I'm going to pretend that it was, anyway."

"Be sure to savor it. Good night, Lorelai."

"Awww. But why?" Lorelai pouts.

"Because it is very, very late and I am a tired old man," Chris explains.

"But I-"

"Lorelai…" Chris interrupts her, a warning in his tone.

"I'm scared," she admits very quietly.

Christopher laughs. "Of what?"

"Tigers."

"In Stars Hollow?"

"Tigers are dangerous, Christopher," Lorelai says very seriously.

"Indeed they are," Christopher answers. "But I don't think they're native to Connecticut.

"I know that…but they can move around. I wasn't born in Stars Hollow, either. But I'm here now."

"There aren't even any tigers in _The Wizard of Oz_," Chris says.

"That's not a particularly good reason to not be afraid of them," Lorelai counters.

"But I just don't understand where…"

"Lions and tigers and bears," Lorelai chants in a whisper.

"Oh my," Chris says with no emotion.

"When I came upstairs, I thought I saw a flash of orange," Lorelai tries to explain.

"Which just means that you're tired and ought to go to sleep."

"You're probably right." Lorelai admits. "Sleep would be a really good thing." Chris sighs in relief. "We should probably sleep in shifts," Lorelai smiles. "I'll take the first eight hours, and then it'll be your turn." Lorelai suggests with a hint of a smile in her voice.

"That seems fair," Chris says sarcastically. "Only...what if I drop dead from exhaustion?"

"Then I will be eaten by a wild, migratory tiger."

"And I will feel very bad about it," Chris deadpans.

"I'm glad that's settled."

"Goodnight, Lor."

"Goodnight, Chris." Lorelai hangs up her phone, puts it back on the bedside table and curls up, very relaxed, to go to sleep.

(Black screen: Written by DaliaFlower)

* * *

I know. I'm a horrible specimen of human being. But come on, Lorelai is way too emotionally screwy to fix everything easily... 

The end of episode 2. But so that I don't start recieving hate mail:

* * *

NEXT WEEK ON THE GILMORE GIRLS: 

Announcer Man: He's a part of her past that she can never seem to leave behind.

_A young Christopher and Lorelai are laughing and drinking in the living room of her parents house. _CUT TO:

_A young Christopher and Lorelai stare in through the window at their newborn baby. "She's beautiful," Chris says. "No," Lorelai corrects him, "She's perfect."_ CUT TO:

_Christopher arriving on his motorcycle. Rory screams, "Dad!" and gives him an enormous hug. "Cristopher," Lorelai sighs to herself. _CUT TO:

_Lorelai and Chritopher kissing on the balcony at her parents house. _CUT TO:

_Lorelai and Christopher dancing at Sookie's wedding. Happy. Joking._

Announcer Man: But their relationship has never been easy. CUT TO:

_Lorelai and Christopher are fighting in the kitchen. Chris proposes, and Lorelai starts screaming. _CUT TO:

_"Standing here, talking to you is killing me!" Lorelai screams in her mother's foyer as a distressed Christopher looks crestfallen. _CUT TO:

_"Get some coffee Christopher!" Lorelai screams as Chris tries to follow her as she runs after Luke at her parents wedding._ CUT TO:

_Lorelai wakes up in Christopher's apartment. She looks horribly sad, but Chris is happy as he wraps his arm around her._

Announcer Man: Next week, Lorelai and Christopher take their final step together. CUT TO:

_"What are you doing on Saturday?" Christopher asks into the phone._

_"Nothing," Lorelai answers._

_"We should go out," Chris suggests._

_Lorelai inhales a little in surprise and then says with only minimal hesitation, "Maybe we should."_ CUT TO:

_Chris is standing at the counter in Luke's. "Two large coffees, to go," he says to Cesar._ CUT TO:

_Luke is standing in front of the diner glaring at Christopher. "I can choose not to serve whoever I want! This is MY restaurant!"_

Announcer Man: As Luke and Lorelai start to come to terms with their pasts and their futures...

_Luke lets go and punches Christopher square on the jaw. Two large coffess go flying onto the pavement._ CUT TO:

_Christopher and Lorelai sitting on the front steps of her porch. Chris has one arm around her and she has her head on his shoulder._

Announcer Man: Rory and Logan must come to terms with theirs, as well. CUT TO:

_Rory, screaming into her phone, "This is not how it was supposed to be! I'm supposed to be happy, aren't I?" _CUT TO: Black.

Announcer Man: Next week, on the Gilmore Girls.

* * *

I'm just a big fat tease, aint I? But I never lie. 


	13. Duty Calls

**AN:** This is the beginning of episode three in my version of season 7.

My last update was not particularly popular, so I hope that there is someone left to read this. Regardless, a couple of quick notes: 1) Lorelai and Christopher will NOT be getting together. She simply has to deal with him in a realistic and believable way. 2) Christopher's last appearance will be during this episode (episode...not chapter). 3)I have reached the new category of "beyond annoying." I feel special. TeeHee.

* * *

Lorelai is sitting on the couch in her living room, legs crossed beneath her, the phone held up to her ear. She's all dressed up, her hair is done, her makeup is on but she shows no sign of going anywhere. She is right in the middle of a story and it has gotten her a little worked up. Excitedly she says, "It doesn't really matter how old I was, but I think we had to read it in 3rd grade."

"I was just checking that this was an age appropriate complaint," Christopher's voice answers, amusement evident in his tone.

"So, I had just finished the book and I was distraught! Tinker Bell was dead! I was crying and after I finished clapping I ran down the stairs and into my father's study."

"Uh huh."

"And I told him what had happened. That I had finished Peter Pan and that Tinker Bell was dead and Peter couldn't remember what had happened to her. He smiled at me - such a patronizing fatherly smile - and he took the book from me. And I was still crying and crying, but he just sat there very calmly and read the last few pages of it as I cried."

"That's nice, Lor. He comforted you."

"Not exactly. He lulled me into security by making me _think_ that he was comforting me. But after he was done reading he looked at me sternly - and you know how stern Richard Gilmore can look - and he told me to go back upstairs to finish my book report. I was still in shock, so I didn't go right away. And when I didn't move, he laughed and said, and I quote: 'You shouldn't be so upset, Lorelai. It was probably you that killed her anyway. You mustn't have believed hard enough.' And then he went back to his desk and started to work again!" Lorelai finished triumphantly.

"It's not really a tender memory, but it's not the worst thing I've ever heard…"

"He told an eight-year old girl that she was personally responsible for the death of Tinker Bell. How is that not horrible?"

Chris sighs in consent and asks, "So that's it? That was the most horrible thing your father ever did?"

"I think so," Lorelai says confidently.

"I still think you have to go," Christopher answers.

"But he-"

Chris interrupts her, "You said that I got to be the judge, and I have made my decision. Despite the horrible things that your parents have done to you, you still have to go to Friday night dinner tonight."

Sighing, Lorelai lets out a, "Fine."

"And you have to go now, missy, or you'll be late." Chris' tone is lecturing.

"Fine," she answers again, standing and grabbing her coat from the cushion next to her.

"Hey, what are you doing on Saturday?" Chris asks quickly.

"Tomorrow? Nothing?" Lorelai answers as she slips an arm into the coat sleeve and tries not to drop the phone.

"We should go out," Christopher suggests simply.

Lorelai shrugs the rest of the way into her coat and then exhales deeply and nods her head. "Maybe we should," she agrees with only a slight bit of evident apprehension.

"Will you be awake by eleven?" Chris asks with a smile.

"Seems unlikely."

"I'll see you at noon, then. Have fun with the folks. And I'm sure it wasn't you that killed Tink," he says comfortingly.

"Thanks, Chris."

"I think I did it," he laughs an evil little laugh and then hangs up.

Lorelai stares at the phone and then drops it onto the couch, grabs her purse and heads out the door.

* * *

Logan is smiling from his seat behind his desk. Despite the wide, playful smile, the computers, charts and stacks of papers that cover the desk make him look incredibly busy, and rather important. But he is not paying attention to any of these at this precise moment. He swings his chair around so that he's looking out the dark window onto the lights of London as he says, "Of course there is a great deal to do on a Friday night in London."

Rory is at home in their apartment, dressed in a light blue dress that is bit too formal for a quiet evening at home. She's on the couch with her coat on the seat next to her, sitting with her bare feet curled up under her to keep them warm. Her discarded shows are upside down on the floor in front of her. "Then why aren't you out there doing it?" she asks as a bit of a tease.

"I," Logan replies importantly, "Am working."

"Working? At 11:15 on a Friday night? You?" Rory is incredulous.

"So it would appear. My life has really gone downhill since I left Yale, Ace."

"That's a ringing endorsement for graduation if I ever heard one," Rory answers with a nervous laugh.

"Or for long-distance relationships," Logan quips back.

"Ah, I have some experience with that myself," Rory answers sagely.

"Then your life has gone downhill as well?"

"Considerably. Although it probably didn't have quite as far to roll," Rory answers with a smile.

"So what is on your agenda for your evening?" Logan turns back towards his desk, but doesn't pick up the report that is waiting there for him.

"I was thinking of sitting at home, by myself in my pajamas and eating cookie dough," Rory muses.

"Substitute 'drinking whiskey' for 'eating cookie dough' and you might have a reasonably good time."

"And drink alone? That's just pathetic."

"Thanks for that. Remind me to have the mini-bar taken out of my hotel room," Logan laughs, mocking injury. "I'd hate to be pathetic."

"It's too late for you."

"Speaking of too late, I should get back to my work, or I'll be here much too late for even my father's liking."

"Awww…don't go," Rory whines a little in her cutest voice.

Logan smiles. "You're stalling!" he accuses.

"What?" Rory protests innocently. "I'm doing no such thing."

"You called me half an hour ago with nothing to say and you've refused to let me off the phone three times now."

"Well…" Rory struggles for a response.

"You have to go," Logan lectures.

"Go where?" Rory feigns innocence.

"To dinner."

"Why?" Rory asks.

"Because you said you would."

"They might not even notice," Rory tries hopefully.

"You're right. If there's one thing I know about Emily Gilmore, it's that she doesn't notice what's going on around her."

"You know, I've heard that too," Rory replies in a laughing tone.

"If I have to work tonight, then so do you," Logan says.

"Then _you_ should stop working," Rory replies.

"Or _you_ should go to dinner," Logan counters.

"It'll be boring," Rory complains.

"Drinking with your family is less pathetic than eating cookie dough by yourself."

Sighing, Rory agrees. "Fine, I'll go. But you better be really miserable at work tonight."

"I love you, too, darling."

"Bye," Rory says.

"Have fun," Logan says as he hangs up.

Rory puts down her phone and wearily stands and grabs her coat. Waving sadly in the direction of the fridge she laments, "Goodbye, Mr. Pillsbury," and closes the door on the dark apartment behind her.

(Roll intro)

* * *

Next update will be the Luke & Christopher blowout that we never got in the show. But I had to keep the punch...I loved the punch. 


	14. No One Was Supposed to Get Hurt

As Promised. Sorry it took so long.

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A Saturday morning on a college campus is typically emptier and quieter than the average ghost town, with the students sleeping off their antics of the night before. This Saturday morning, one of the first in the new semester, is no exception at Yale. As we pan through the hallways and courtyards of the University, only a few stragglers, desperately clinging to coffee cups can be seen. One girl, still dressed for a night on the town although with her makeup slightly faded and her hair definitely askew, is walking slowly barefoot through the main courtyard with a pair of strappy green heels dangling from one hand.

Down one hallway, however, we can hear the noise of people talking. As the view opens on the office of the Yale Daily News, the difference from the rest of the campus is striking, as people are gathered in groups talking loudly. Two desks in the center of the room are set up with a sort of breakfast buffet: boxes of donuts, a plate of miniature muffins, bottles of milk and orange juice, several enormous bowls of cereal and a large urn full of coffee next to a stack of Styrofoam cups. Rory is by the buffet straightening the stacks of paper goods and plastic cutlery as she surveys the room with a slight smile. As the happy "La La" music plays in the background, Rory glances around the room with a smile to look at the groups of happily chatting reporters sitting on desks, standing in corners or reading back issues of _her_ paper. Pleased at herself for managing to get 35 college students awake and happy on a Saturday morning, Rory grabs a cup and fills it with coffee from the urn. She smiles as she slowly breathes in the aroma of the hot liquid, and closes her eyes for a brief moment as she takes the first sip.

The cheerful music and the peaceful spell of the coffee fade quickly at the sound of Paris' voice issuing angrily from one corner of the room. "I _already_ have a boyfriend, you tiny Lothario!" Rory opens her eyes and quickly looks to the far corner of the room where many of her veteran reporters including Bill, Glenn and Paris are clustered. At the moment she looks, a short, younger looking boy runs from the group and out of the newspaper's office with a look of fear on his face. Sighing, Rory walks over to the group.

"I don't think he was hitting on you, Pairs…" Glenn is saying quietly as he looks at the fleeing form of the young freshman.

"A woman can always tell when she's being asked out, Glenn," Paris says testily.

"Trust me, there's no danger of anyone here making _that _mistake," Bill responds with a sarcastic smirk.

Paris' eyes flash towards Bill and every male in the group visibly tenses as she asks, "Really? Why's that, Bill?"

Swallowing hard, Bill cowers under Paris' gaze.

After a brief silence during which several possibilities for Bill's gruesome demise are played out across Paris' face, Glenn chimes in tentatively, "None of us would want to disrespect Doyle like that." Paris' face softens only the slightest bit and she looks completely unsatisfied with the lame response.

"If you scare them all away, we'll have no freshmen left," Rory says good naturedly to Paris, attempting to break the tension.

"So?" a voice from the group asks.

"We need the freshmen," Rory explains to the group. "We need them to cover bad plays and sporting events. Without the freshmen, we'll have to do it."

"I do hate lacrosse," Paris muses as several other reporters nod.

"And don't forget about your scorn of modern dance," Rory says to several disgusted faces and nods of agreement. "So be nice to the freshmen. Make them feel welcome. Show them the ropes."

"Teach them how I like my coffee!" Joni interjects, raising her cup.

"Not quite the vibe I was going for there, Joni," Rory responds with a smile. "But whatever gets them to stick around." Rory looks pointedly at Paris.

"He was creepy," Paris responds.

"He just asked if you were going to the party," Glenn says quietly. Paris shoots him a death look.

"What party?" Rory asks cheerfully, trying to keep Paris from killing anyone and ruining her so-far successful Saturday morning meeting.

Happy for the distraction, Glenn replies cheerfully. "Mine. It's gonna be sort of a start of the year/housewarming/seniors rule type of event."

"Housewarming?" Rory asks. "Are you growing up on us, Glenn?"

"Not really. Me and a couple of guys went in together on a house in New Haven. We all have to share a bathroom, so it's no more grown up than living in the dorms. Although we do have a yard."

"Five guys and one bathroom. I hope you're getting National Science Foundation funding for that experiment," Paris says harshly.

"A yard? That is awfully grown up, Glenn." Rory says before Glenn has a chance to formulate a full response to Paris' remark.

"Stop saying that, it's scaring me," Glenn says with a slight blush. "It's no big deal."

"It is. You're settling down and spreading out." Rory says comfortingly patting Glenn on the shoulder.

"Spreading out is just what he needs," Paris mumbles under her breath.

"What?" Glenn's voice is high pitched. Bill is smirking behind him. "Why are you-??"

"She can't help it," Bill says, quietly but sarcastically.

"But I'm not fat!" Glenn continues to protest in an injured voice.

"We know," Joni says encouragingly. Paris just rolls her eyes.

Sighing, Glenn looks towards Rory. "You should come."

Rory looks hesitant, but smiles anyway. "Oh, well maybe…I might be able to…"

Glenn picks up on the hesitation and tries to convince her to come. "Oh no. You should definitely come. It's gonna be fun."

"We're all going," Joni offers.

"Yes, come and support the extra-extra-curricular activities of your crack staff!" Bill raises an imaginary glass.

"You mean my cracked staff," Rory responds with a smile.

"There will be music and beverages of various sorts and types. We'll play some games," Glenn explains enthusiastically.

"Games?" Paris mocks with one eyebrow raised.

"Yes, games." Glenn answers defensively. "Beer pong. Dart."

"Darts," Paris hisses the ending 'ess'. "It's called darts."

"Not at my house," Glenn retorts.

Paris' face clearly reads, "Oh really?"

"We've only got one dart at my house." Glenn explains with a forced smile.

"That's not at all pathetic," Paris responds acidly.

Turning to Rory in an attempt not to scream at Paris, Glenn continues. "But we do have two dart boards." Rory nods with a look that only barely hides her desire to laugh in Glenn's face. "So we set them up on opposite sides of the room and one player stands with each board. Then you can throw the dart from one side to the other and everyone gets a turn. It's even better than darts, because no one needs to walk across the room to get the darts after their turn. It's thrown to you!" Glenn is a little excited.

"That's just what you need, another way to avoid exercise," Paris says scathingly.

"Hey!" Glenn sounds hurt again. "I'm the same size I was in high school!"

"How can you tell, Judy?" Paris replies quickly and harshly. "Still fit into your prom dress?"

"Do you?" Glenn spits back. As the words leave his mouth everyone in the group tenses, including Rory.

"I didn't go to my prom," Paris answers, a little too calmly.

"Big surprise," Glenn responds again, heedless of the dangerous waters he is now in.

Bill places a reassuring hand on Glenn's shoulder, Joni scrunches her face in worry and several other reporters look away entirely. Rory, on the other hand, puts on her best cheerful voice and says, "I didn't go to prom either! That way my mom can't embarrass me with the pictures in 20 years."

"She's still got that one of you in the tub on the mantle," Paris answers sullenly.

"Naked babies are still cute in 20 years," Rory responds without letting Paris get her riled up. "Prom dresses rarely are."

"Don't I know it. My mom's had this huge bow across the back," Joni gestures with her hands. "It made her look enormous."

"Joni, I've met your mother." Bill pipes up again. "And she's not exactly a small woman."

"All the more reason _not_ to add a giant taffeta bow to your butt," Joni responds.

"Are you listening, Glenn? This is important fashion advice for you," Paris is harsh. "No horizontal stripes and no giant taffeta bows on your butt. Got it? Or do you want me to write it down for you?"

Glenn looks down quickly at his horizontally striped shirt before Bill quietly says, "Stop thinking about Glenn's butt, Paris."

"Ok, I think it's about time we got this thing started," Rory says with a slightly flustered smile. "Bill, I need you to go find the freshman that just ran out of here. Paris, I need you to your desk and not talk to any freshmen." Paris starts to argue and Rory adds quickly, "Or sophomores. Glenn, get the beat sheets from my desk and pass them around to everyone. Joni-"

"I'm going to go help Bill." Joni is already following him out the door.

"I think he can handle one freshman," Rory counters.

"Me too. But I thought you'd want them all to come back," Joni smirks.

The attitude on Paris' face starts to fade a little as she begins to walk quietly towards her desk. "How many?" Rory asks.

"Four," Joni answers.

"Well," Rory shrugs, "it's better than last year. Go on." Joni jogs out the door after Bill as Rory nods her head in that direction. Rory walks back over to her desk with her half-empty coffee cup in hand, shooting an admonishing glance at Paris in the corner. Glenn shoots her a big smile as he starts to make his way through the room, handing out papers as he goes. Rory forces a smile back at him as she sits lightly on the edge of her desk, reading over her notes for the meeting.

Rory jumps visibly as Paris sits down next to her and says, "Logan loves parties," in her loud monotone.

"I know," Rory answers as she settles herself.

"He'd go to the party," Paris continues.

Rory looks annoyed and uncomfortable as she squirms on the desk. "What are you-?"

"He'd probably even tell you to go to the party," Paris interrupts.

"So?" Rory pointedly returns to reading her notes.

"I bet if you called him right now he'd tell you to go to Glenn's tonight."

"I'm not…he…" Rory glances quickly at Paris who is calmly surveying the room. "I don't need his permission," she ends defensively.

"No?"

"Maybe I just don't want to go." Rory is still defensive.

"Maybe," Paris doesn't agree at all.

"Maybe I don't think an editor should go out drinking with her staff."

"Maybe."

"Maybe I just don't like Glenn very much," Rory says with a straight face.

"Another strong possibility, Gilmore. But even I'm going."

"Maybe I don't want to have to testify at your trial," Rory tries to sound good-natured.

"Listen, Rory. I know how important great phone sex can be in a long-distance relationship."

Rory jumps off the desk and makes a truly disgusted face at Paris. "Paris! Ugh! I really-"

But Paris continues. "No, really. Doyle may have a mild-mannered exterior, but when he gets going he can spout off a string of dirtiness that would shock Elliot Spitzer."

"Awww…Paris. Doyle's my friend." Rory looks thoroughly uncomfortable as she looks around the room to check if anyone in the immediate vicinity was paying attention.

"But no matter how badly Huntsburger sets your socks to shaking, it's not really a good substitute for having a life."

"He doesn't…we don't…my socks are not…" Rory can't put even half of a sentence together.

"They should be," Paris says easily, amused at Rory's discomfort. "But the point is that we're seniors this year. And our boyfriends aren't here with us anymore. So we have to make our own fun."

Rory turns to Paris, slightly calmer than before and asks, "Doyle has to work tonight, doesn't he?"

"Some stupid public hearing that his editor wants him to cover," Paris answers, chagrined.

"Do you need to borrow something to wear, too?" Rory asks, amazed and annoyed.

"No, just a date," Paris answers simply.

"Didn't I tell you to sit quietly in the corner?" Rory asks.

"I will if you come with me tonight," Paris insists.

"And if I don't want to go to a silly, drunken party?"

"I've got more," Paris says simply. "And I can be louder."

"You better not kiss me again," Rory relents and points to the corner.

Paris smirks at the memory, "Doyle would be mad if he wasn't around for it this time."

Inhaling deeply, Rory pats down her clothes to smooth them and turns to face the office. "OK, people, grab your coffee. It's time to get this thing started!"

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It is a simply gorgeous day in Stars Hollow, one of those lingering warm days in September that remind us why we miss summer after it leaves. There are people in the streets enjoying what appear to be the remnants of a farmer's market in the square. We watch as Jackson hands a bag of green peppers to a man in a baseball cap with a smile and a promise of their quality. "Best peppers in Connecticut."

The door is jingling across the square at Luke's as it starts to fill up for the lunchtime crowd. As the music plays, we enter the diner to see Cesar behind the counter and Luke out on the floor taking orders. Taylor is sitting at the counter trying to hide behind a newspaper as he spies through the window at his ice cream shoppe. The ice cream parlor is busy on this warm fall day, and Taylor can be heard mumbling to himself, "Only one sample per customer, Trudy. And I don't care how cute he is. Tsk. Ask him if he wants a waffle cone, Charlie. He looks hungry. He'd probably buy a waffle cone. Oh come on, people." He shakes his head at his staff's disappointing performance.

Kirk and Lulu are sitting at a small table all the way towards the back of the diner. Lulu is perusing the menu, trying to decide what she wants for lunch. "Luke sure does have a lot of salads on his menu," she says cheerfully. "Maybe I'll have this one…" she reads through the offerings.

"Are you sure?" Kirk asks awkwardly. "How about a cheeseburger?"

"Oooh! This one sounds good!" Lulu points to the menu.

Desperately insistent, Kirk tries again. "I bet you'd really like a cheeseburger."

"No Kirk, I told you already. At school we've been learning about vegetarianism. So for homework this week we all have to try it."

"You're not a student! You can have a cheeseburger if you want it!" He's practically whining. "Why not try one with mushrooms?" He sounds tortured as he stuffs his hand into his pocket.

"I'm the teacher and I have to set a good example," Lulu explains firmly. "This salad has mushrooms on it," she tries to console him.

"It's not the same as a cheeseburger," Kirk mumbles.

"That's the point, Kirk." Lulu has the patience of an angel. "You can still have a cheeseburger."

"I don't want a cheeseburger."

"That's the spirit, sweetums!" Lulu is enthusiastic again as she points out the different salads available to her distraught boyfriend who has clearly given up in exasperation.

By this point, Luke is trying to take an order from Miss Patty and Babette, who have taken up a table near the front window. Neither of them seems interested in placing an order, but they are simply trying to molest, annoy and are otherwise confuse Luke. The circus appears to have been going on for quite some time. Luke seems frustrated as his head drifts back and forth between the ladies as they bandy about the latest gossip.

"So, what'll you two have this morning?" Luke asks, his pen ready.

"I always knew that something wasn't quite right with that boy," Miss Patty shakes her head sadly, ignoring Luke completely. "But to do something like that to Angela? That poor woman."

"Oh yeah!" Babette answers with her typical energy before she realizes how cheerful her voice sounds. "That poor girl," she added in a more respectful tone. "I never would have expected it!"

Luke is standing above them, his mouth slightly open as he tries –fruitlessly – to get a word in.

"Oh, I knew it had to come eventually. We used to date," Miss Patty explained in her low voice.

"No way!" Babette exclaims. "You used to date Mark Zieger?!"

"In high school, dear," Patty explains calmly.

"I don't believe it! Luke! Did you know that-" Babette jerks her head around and screams, practically directly into Luke's ear. "Oh! There you are, sugar."

"Yes, here I am," Luke replies in a somewhat angry monotone as he holds his hand to one ear.

"You shouldn't stand so close to me. I could shatter your eardrum!" Babette chastises.

"Really?" Luke asks sarcastically.

"Oh yeah!" Babette screams again. "The doctors say it has something to do with my voice and the resonant frequency of the human ear! Whatever that means!" She adds with a laugh. "Alls I know is that it happens to Morey every couple 'a months or so. Usually when I've been extremely loud," Babette gestures with her hands, "If you know what I mean."

"No," Luke says, with a disgusted look.

"No?" Babette asks. "Well, I woulda thought that at your age you would have…but if you need me to explain it to ya, pull up a chair." She motions at the table.

"I understand." Luke says through gritted teeth. "I meant, 'No, we're not going to have this conversation."

"I don't know about you, sweetheart, but _we_ certainly are," Miss Patty says with a smirk and a quick raise of her eyebrows. Luke grimaces slightly and then throws up his hands and walks back into the kitchen.

As Luke walks away, the scene stays focused on Babette and Miss Patty, although through the window behind them we can see traffic passing the diner, including a silver Volvo.

"Anyway darling," Patty drawls. "I've known that there were several things wrong with that man for years."

"Aw, nuthin's wrong with Luke. He's just a bit shy," Babette answers.

"Not Luke, honey, Mark Zieger. Although Luke's had a few screws loose lately too." Patty adds the last in a whisper.

"Ah…he's always a bit upset without Lor- well, ya know," Babette looks around to make sure no one heard her. "He's been under a lot of stress lately. Can't really blame him."

"No, of course not," Miss Patty aggress with spirit. "But he was never caught half naked in the dressing room at Macy's with his brother and a rubber chicken!"

"Ha!" Babette laughs loudly. "Although Luke doesn't have a brother does he?" She points towards the kitchen.

Patty smiles broadly and is on the point of responding when the diner door opens with a jingle and Christopher Hayden walks in, distractedly patting his pants pockets. Patty is left practically speechless and a weak and confused, "Or a rubber chicken…" is all she manages to get out as both women stare at Christopher in the doorway.

He checks his back pocket one more time, mutters "Damn it," under his breath and leaves the diner quickly with a second jingle.

Babette is still staring wide-mouthed at the space Christopher has just vacated when Luke pops his head out of the kitchen to yell, "Take a seat anywhere!" He shrugs when he doesn't see any additional customers and ducks done behind the counter to pick something up.

"Luke!" Patty screams in her shrillest voice. A loud thud followed by a groan can be heard coming from behind the counter. "We want to order now!"

Babette looks confusedly at Patty and mouths, "We do?"

Luke walks over to the table somewhat slowly, with one hand rubbing the other shoulder. "Are you sure this time? Because I'm not gonna stand here for twenty minutes this time discussing the very unnecessary details of someone else's sex life."

"No one made you stay, doll," Patty says with a smile before launching at top speed into her order. "I'll need extra crispy hash browns, two fried eggs and pancakes."

Luke looks surprised but only asks, "Bacon or sausage?"

"Ummm, which takes longer to cook?" Patty asks, and Babette's eyes light up as she realizes what's going on.

"Sausage," Luke answers.

"Then I'll have well-done sausage."

"My sausage only comes at one level of done," Luke responds with a confused look.

"Then cook it that way, and then add five minutes," Patty answers.

"So, burnt?"

"Fine if that's what you want to call it," Patty answers with exasperation as she tries to steal a glance out the window.

Luke shakes his head and turns to Babette with his order pad.

"A Belgian waffle with fresh whipped cream," Babette says quickly.

"I don't have fresh whipped cream. It comes out of the can." Luke answers.

"Couldn't you make some for me?" Babette whines.

"I don't think so."

"It's my birthday," Babette tries.

"No it's not. Your birthday was last month. There was a big cat cake in the square, remember?" Luke replies quickly and with obvious disdain for the cake.

Patty's eyebrows shoot up on her forehead as she looks out the window and obviously sees something worrying. She moves her hands rapidly, clearly indicating that Babette should order faster.

"Fine. No whipped cream. Belgian waffle with a strawberry smiley face like you make for Kirk when he's having a bad day." Babette says very quickly as Patty continues to look worried. "And one of those organic low-fat bran muffins."

"What? I haven't sold those in –"

"Just go check in the back room, I bet you can find me one more." Babette says harshly.

"Everyone hated them and said that they tasted like dirt,"

"Sometimes a girl's got to eat a little dirt to get what she wants," Patty explains quickly. "For instance, one time I was at my cousin's lake house in Wisconsin when we stumbled across the most darling European man just sitting completely naked in the woods…"

"That's far enough," Luke says, quickly interrupting Miss Patty's story. "I'll try to find the muffin." He turns and walks back behind the curtain toward the back room.

As soon as he disappears from sight, Patty and Babette exhale deeply. A second later, the door jingles again, and Christopher re-enters the diner holding his wallet.

Chris walks calmly towards the front counter in a pair of jeans, brown leather shoes and a pale green dress shirt. As he passes their table, Miss Patty and Babette exchange a nervous look. The majority of the diners continue their meals and conversations, oblivious to the drama that just walked through the front door. Chris stands a little awkwardly in front of the counter as he waits for someone to help him. He's working very hard at keeping it cool as he stands too far from the counter to touch it, despite several empty seats along its length.

Within a short minute, Cesar pops his head out from the kitchen, looks at Chris and says, "You gonna rob the place?"

"What?" Chris asks, confused.

"You're standing kinda funny. Like you're not sure what to do next," Cesar explains. "I figured it could be cuz you've never robbed a diner before."

Chris relaxes visibly as his brain processes the question and that the person asking it is not Luke. "Well, that's true enough," Chris answers as he relaxes slightly and leans an arm on the diner's counter. "I've never robbed anywhere before."

"And the thought of it makes you nervous?" Cesar asks.

"No robbery today, my friend. Just breakfast."

"So breakfast makes you nervous?"

"Well, it is the most important meal of the day. That's a lot of pressure," Chris jokes. "I wouldn't want to screw it up."

Cesar empties a frying pan full of eggs onto a plate and exits the kitchen to deliver the plate to a hungry customer sitting near the window. Chris scans the diner counter, eying the selection of pastries and baked goods. Cesar returns to the counter and asks, "Come to a decision yet?"

Chris nods. "Two cherry danishes and two large coffees. To go."

"You put a lot of pressure on your self for pre-cooked pastries," Cesar responds with a shake of his head. "I don't think there's any nutritional value at all in one of those," he points at the tray of danishes.

"That's why I ordered two," Chris says with a smirk.

Cesar doesn't get the joke, but pulls two of the requested pastries off of the tray, puts them in a thin paper sleeve and lays them on the counter in front of Christopher. He takes two paper cups off the stack and starts to pour coffee into them. "Anything in the coffees?"

"One black. The other even blacker," Chris answers.

"Right," Cesar nods as he fastens the lids to the cups and places them on the counter. He punches a few buttons on the register and announces, "$7.89."

Chris reaches into his wallet and produces a ten-dollar bill. As Cesar takes the bill, the supply room curtain is pushed aside as Luke walks in backward holding a brown box. "Alright, Babette," he calls, turning and placing the apparently heavy box on the counter. "I don't have any more muffins, but I did find a box of-"

Luke stops dead as he sees Christopher, who is very intently watching Cesar count out his change.

"Oh, boy," comes the muttered comment from Babette at her table.

"No," Luke doesn't quite scream the word, but the anger behind it is intense. "What do you think you're doing here?" Luke has barely moved and seems frozen in place, his hands still on the box.

Christopher straightens. Cesar, blissfully unaware, fights to open a roll of dimes.

"Hey, I'm just getting some breakfast," Chris answers in what he obviously thinks is a comforting voice.

Luke glances quickly to take in the pair of danishes and coffees and replies immediately. "Like hell you are."

Cesar looks up and starts with a smile, "Don't worry, he's not robbing the place." The smile dies as he sees Luke's face and he finishes rather lamely with a mumbled, "I asked him already."

"Listen," Christopher begins, but he never quite finishes the thought as Luke, who up until this moment has been frozen to the ground by the sight of Christopher, suddenly seems to be everywhere at once.

"No, I'm not listening to anything you have to say," Luke announces as he rounds the counter and moves somewhat menacingly towards Christopher. Chris abandons his change and starts to back away towards the door, clutching the danishes and a single cup of coffee in front of him like a shield as he goes.

"…I'll just take my food and…" Chris tries to sound assertive but it doesn't work.

"This is not your food! This is my food. That is my coffee." Luke points to the cup. "Everything in this building," he gestures somewhat wildly at the air around him, "Is mine. I own it. So unless you want me to own you, I'd get out of here **now.**" The last word is almost a growl, but it's enough to get Chris out through the diner's front door, backend first, still clutching most of his breakfast.

"Luke," Chris sputters as he shuffles his feet to regain his balance. "You can't just kick me out every time I come around. We're gonna have to learn-"

"I can choose not to serve whoever I want! This is MY restaurant!" Luke says passionately, his arms crossed in front of his chest. "This is MY town!"

"Even if it is, you can't keep me from being here and if Lorela –aiii!" Christopher never gets to finish his thought. As soon as he starts to say her name, Luke lets go and punches Christopher square on the jaw. Christopher flies backward from the force of the blow, arms flailing, coffee cup and danishes flying through the air. He trips over the edge of the stairs and his ass hits the sidewalk – hard – before the rest of him. As he lands all the breath seems to rush out of him, the two cherry danishes slide out of their paper wrapper and land fruit side down on his chest while the coffee cup lands closer to his stomach, its lid dislodged and its contents pouring onto his shirt and the pavement beneath him.

Christopher groans deeply, moving quickly to push the cup off of him. As he sits up, the danishes begin to slide down his chest, leaving a trail of sticky, red fruit along his crisp, green shirt. Chris has disbelief and pain painted clearly across his face as he surveys the ground, the mess on his shirt and finally looks back up at Luke who has already turned to walk back inside.

"Hey!" Chris shouts at Luke's retreating back as he tries to stand, but the door opens with its cheerful 'jingle' and Luke enters his diner and slams the door behind him.

Every one of Luke's customers still have their faces pressed up against the windows, watching Christopher scream once more at the unresponsive storefront.

Luke himself walks back to his counter and grabs the heavy box he had retrieved from the storeroom and drops it heavily on the table where Babette had been sitting. Everyone turn sharply from the window at the noise. Luke points at the box and grunts, "Muffin mix," before turning back and heading past the curtain and up the stairs towards his apartment.

"Great," Babette says with mock cheer. And as Luke disappears up the stairs she adds, "Damn things taste like dirt."

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(Commercial Break)


End file.
